Thanksgiving Jokes / Recent Jokes

Be as thankful as you want, but you're still going to have something to answer for...
Lust: Circling the kitchen, drooling over the food being prepared.
Greed: Stealing food from someone's plate... While yours is still full.
Sloth: Passing out after Thanksgiving dinner, before the dishes are clean, and blaming it on the turkey.
Envy: Wishing you could be the one passed out on the recliner instead of washing the dishes.
Wrath: Throwing beer at the TV because your team lost.
Pride: Throwing beer at your relatives because your team won.
Gluttony: The Turducken. Nuff said.
I'm just thankful I'm not a Christian.

Why did they let the turkey join the band?
Because he had the drumsticks

What's the key to a great Thanksgiving dinner?
The turKEY

What did the turkey say before it was roasted?
Boy! I'm stuffed!

10. You're sure to get at least one of your favorite dishes.
9. The turkey never suffers from modesty.
8. You can nibble before dinner even if mom sees you.
7. You are expected to pass the dishes around.
6. There are always at least two kinds of desert, with or
without whipped cream.
5. They give you the day off WITH pay to have dinner.
4. Thanksgiving dinner is a "sure" thing.
3. Seconds are encouraged. Take home, too!!
2. You're expected to fall asleep after dinner.
And the number 1 reason why Thanksgiving dinner is better
than sex:
1. You are EXPECTED to watch football BEFORE and AFTER
dinner.

Why did the Indian chief wear so many feathers?
To keep his wigwam

Just before Thanksgiving, the holding pen was abuzz as Mother Turkey scolded the younger birds.
"You turkeys are always into mischief," she gobbled. "If your grandfather could see the things you do, he'd turn over in his gravy."