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You think about Korean martial arts everyday. You begin to sprinkle Korean words and phrases into your conversation. You have a Korean dictionary which you never use. When you see a magazine rack you quickly check for new martial arts magazines first and read the articles on Korean martial arts first. You always make it a point to check the martial arts section of the bookstore and look for Korean martial arts books first. You shop for clothes based on your ability to high kick in them. Adidas is your favorite sports clothing brand. You sewed your school patch onto your bathrobe. You tie your monogrammed bathrobe belt (which you never wash) into a square knot and then check to make sure the ends are exactly even. You open the refrigerator door with a roundhouse kick and shut it with a side kick. You develop a taste for Korean food and other Asian food as well. You develop an interest in Korean members of the opposite sex. You look more to your sabumnim/kwanjangnim for guidance and more...

Earl was telling his buddies back on the farm about his first visit to a big city church. "When I got there, they made me park my old pick-up in the corral," he began.
"You mean in the parking lot," interrupted Jeb, a more worldly fellow.
"Then I walked up the trail to the door," Earl continued.
"The sidewalk to the door," Jeb corrected.
"Inside the door, I was met by some dude," Earl went on.
"That would be the usher," explained Jeb.
"Well, the usher led me down the chute," said Earl.
"You mean the aisle," Jeb said.
"Then, he led me to a stall and told me to sit there," continued Earl.
"Pew," retorted Jeb.
"Yeah," Jeb recalled. "That's exactly what the pretty lady said when I sat down beside her."

GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN
Between 18 and 22, a woman is like Africa; half discovered, half wild, naturally beautiful with fertile soil.
Between 23 and 30, a woman is like America; well developed and open to trade, especially for someone with cash.
Between 31 and 35, a woman is like India; very hot, relaxed and convinced of her own beauty.
Between 36 and 40, a woman is like France; gently aging but still warm, and a desirable place to visit.
Between 41 and 50, a woman is like Great Britain; with a glorious and all conquering past.
Between 51 and 60, a woman is like Yugoslavia; lost the war and haunted by past mistakes.
Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Russia; very wide, and borders are now un-patrolled.
After 70, she becomes Tibet. Wildly beautiful, with a mysterious past and the wisdom of the ages... only those with an adventurous spirit and a thirst for spiritual knowledge visit there.
GEOGRAPHY OF A MAN
At any age, a man is like Iran - ruled by a more...

There once was a husband and wife who were unable to have children. After consulting everyone who would listen to their problem, they were still unsatisfied. Finally, they consulted their family priest.
"My children," the priest began, "The Lord will listen to your prayers, and I am sure that you will be blessed with children shortly. In fact, I am planning an extended stay in Rome, and while I'm visiting the Vatican, I will light a candle for you."
"Thank you, Father, thank you!" said the couple.
Before leaving, the priest turned and said, "I am sure everything will work out just fine for you. My stay in Rome will be for quite some time-15 years. But when I return, I will be sure to pay you a visit."
And so, 15 years came and went, and the priest returned to the States.
While resting on his porch one mid-summer morning, he remembered the promise of paying a visit that he had made 15 years ago. So he made his way to their more...

After a visit to the circus, Geoff and Don were discussing the thrills and marvels they had seen. "I didnt think much of the knife thrower, did you?" said Geoff. "I thought he was great!" enthused Don. "Well, I didnt," said Geoff. "He kept throwing those knives at that soppy girl but he didnt hit her once."

A blind man decided to take a trip and visit Texas. When he got on the plane, he felt the seats and exclaimed, "Wow, these seats sure are big."
"Everything is big in Texas," the person in the seat next to him said.
Finally arriving in Texas, he decided to visit a bar. He entered, ordered a beer and a mug was placed between his hands. "Goodness these mugs are big," he said.
"Yep, that's 'cause everything is big in Texas," replied the bartender.
After having a couple of beer, the blind man asked the bartender where the bathroom was.
"Second door to the right," answered the bartender.
The blind man headed for the bathroom but accidentally tripped over and went right past the second door. Instead, he entered the third door which lead straight to the swimming pool and he fell in.
Scared to death, the blind man started screaming, "Don't flush, please don't flush!"

With all the new technology regarding fertility, an 88-year-old woman was able to give birth to a baby recently.
When she was discharged from the hospital and went home, various relatives came to visit. "May we see the new baby?" one of them asked.
"Not yet," said the mother. "I'll make coffee and we can visit for a while first."
Another half hour passed before another relative asked, "May we see the new baby now?"
"No, not yet," said the mother.
A while later and again the guests asked, "May we see the baby now?"
"No, not yet," replied the mother.
Growing impatient, they asked, "Well, when can we see the baby?"
"When she cries!" she told them.
"When she cries?" they gasped. "Why do we have to wait until she cries?"
"Because, I forgot where I put her."