Whorehouse Jokes / Recent Jokes
A guy was sitting around his house watching TV when he realized he was pretty freakin horny. So he hoppped into his car and drove to his local bordello(whorehouse). When he arrived, he walked up to the madam and realized he only had a five dollar bill. He looked up pittifully at the madam and asked what he could get for five dollars. After a few moments of thought she replied that she would allow him to have his way with a chicken for five dollars. The man was infuriated and began to walk back to his car when the feeling hit him again. He turned promtly around and went back into the bordello(whorehouse). He agreed sheepishly to scronck the chicken. She directed him down the hall and into the third door on the left wherein stood the ususpecting chicken. The chicken bolted!-The man gave chase! After some time the man caught her by the neck.(it was a HER, this guy wasn't a pervert or anything)He began to "do his thing" to the chicken. He did it hard!-He did it fast!-Feathers more...
There's this man who's taking a walk around the red light districtuntil he passes a whorehouse with a blinking sign saying: "TheHooker With Three Breasts...". The man get's just a littleinterested and thinks "well... that could be a once in a lifetimeexperience". So he goes in and walks up to the man behind thecounter. "I'd like to see the hooker with the three breasts" hesays." Are you sure you can afford that... It'll cost you a thousanddollars" the pimp replies. But, the man is too exited, pull's hiswallet and pays him the money. So, he's taken up three stairs to alittle room in the back of the house and when he opens the room... there she is. The room is dark but as he comes closer he sees it... three breasts! And so the man absolutely has the night of his life. The next day the man walks past that same whorehouse and thinking ofthe night before and the time he had, he goes in and pays the pimpanother thousand dollars. Again, he goes up more...
One evening, an Indian walked into the old western town near the out skirts of his village.
When he got to main street he headed straight for the whorehouse. When he got to the whorehouse he walked up to a woman there and he held out a small bag of gold and said, "me have money, me want woman."
She looked him up and down and said, "Boy, you need to know how to make love to a woman, before getting with one of my girls. Come back when you have some experience." The Indian left and walked out of the town back to his village.
The following day he went out to the woods and found a tree with a knothole in it, and had his way with the tree, and proceeded on with other trees late into the evening.
The following evening, the Indian walked back into town with his sack of gold in one hand and a 2x4 piece of wood in the other. When he stepped inside the whorehouse, the same older woman greeted him...
He then held out his more...
Business was terrible at the new whorehouse. Customers were so scarce the madam of the house knew she had to do something to bring in more business.
"This has often been described as the oldest business in the world," she said to herself, "why shouldn't I advertise just like any business?"
She gave an advertising agency a call and a representative came out. Once he understood the problem, he suggested attaching a neon sign to the front of the whorehouse. A lighted sign would be highly visible after dark when most customers would be likely to come around.
He also recommended a sign that displayed the bodies of a man and woman having sex. The representative then said, "To guarantee the sign will be an absolute eye-catching success, I insist it must be designed to flash on and off."
"Sounds like a great idea to me," the madam replied, "except for one thing. Wouldn't it draw a lot more customers if it flashed in and out instead more...
One Saturday, Little Johnny's bored, so he says to his father, "Dad, I'm bored. What's there to do?"
His dad decides to have a little fun with him, so he gives Johnny four quarters. "Here, son," his father says, "why don't you go to the drugstore and get me some 'what's what'?"
Excited, although somewhat baffled, Johnny rushes down the street to the drugstore. He approaches the druggist and asks him for some 'what's what'. Initially, the druggist is confused, but soon guesses that this kid has been sent out on a wild goose chase.
"I'm sorry, young man, we don't have any, but that building over there might," the druggist says, as he points towards a whorehouse.
Filled with excitement, Johnny races over to the whorehouse. He knocks on the door and a naked woman answers it.
"I need some... hey, what's that?" Johnny says, motioning to her crotch.
"What's what?" she replies.
Satisfied, Johnny says, more...