Whorehouse Jokes / Recent Jokes
A little boy hears the word whorehouse in school and asks his father what it means. His father is quite shocked, and replies: "Well, uh... you go there to... have a good time." The boy starts screaming and hollering that he wants to go there too, but his father insists that he's too young.
Saturday night his dad and a few friends go to "Suzie's" to "have a good time", not knowing the little boy is following them.
After his father leaves, the little boy enters the whorehouse and tells the madame that he wants to have a good time. She's a bit puzzled at first, but being a kind-hearted lady she gives him three doughnuts and tells him to leave.
Later that night he comes home, his parents all worried. His father approaches him first and asks him where he's been.
"IN A WHOREHOUSE!" he screams proudly.
"WHAT? Well... uh... how was it?"
"I managed the first two without any problem, but I just licked the more...
A guy thought his wife was cheating on him. So he waited for her to leave that night and jumped in a cab to follow her. By following her he found out she was working in a whorehouse. The guy says to the cabbie, "Wanna make a $100?" The cabbie says, "Sure, what do I have to do?".
The guy replied that all the cabbie has to do was go inside the whorehouse and grab his wife and put her in the back of the cab and take them home. So the cabbie goes in.
A couple of minutes later the whore house gets kicked open, and the cabbie is dragging this women out who is kicking, biting, punching, and fighting all the way to the cab. The cabbie opens the door to the cab, throws the girl inside, and tells the man, "Here hold her!!"
The man looks down at the girl and says to the cabbie, "THIS AIN'T MY WIFE".
The cabbie replied, "I KNOW, IT'S MINE; I'M GOING BACK IN FOR YOURS!!"
There was a Barber Shop on a military reservation, and a Colonel and a Sergeant are both getting haircuts. The Colonel's barber is about done with him, and asks him if he wishes hair tonic.
The Colonel says, "Hell no, if I get that stuff on my hair, my wife will think I've been in a whorehouse!". Right after that, the Sergeant's barber asks him the same question.
The Sergeant replies, "Go ahead and put some on, my wife doesn't know what a whorehouse smells like!".
There's this man who's taking a walk around the red light district
until he passes a whorehouse with a blinking sign saying: "The
Hooker With Three Breasts...". The man get's just a little
interested and thinks "well... that could be a once in a lifetime
experience". So he goes in and walks up to the man behind the
counter. "I'd like to see the hooker with the three breasts" he
says.
"Are you sure you can afford that... It'll cost you a thousand
dollars" the pimp replies. But, the man is too exited, pull's his
wallet and pays him the money. So, he's taken up three stairs to a
little room in the back of the house and when he opens the room...
there she is. The room is dark but as he comes closer he sees it...
three breasts! And so the man absolutely has the night of his life.
The next day the man walks past that same whorehouse and thinking of
the night before and the time he had, he goes in more...
There's this man who's taking a walk around the red light districtuntil he passes a whorehouse with a blinking sign saying: "TheHooker With Three Breasts...". The man get's just a littleinterested and thinks "well... that could be a once in a lifetimeexperience". So he goes in and walks up to the man behind thecounter. "I'd like to see the hooker with the three breasts" hesays."Are you sure you can afford that... It'll cost you a thousanddollars" the pimp replies. But, the man is too exited, pull's hiswallet and pays him the money. So, he's taken up three stairs to alittle room in the back of the house and when he opens the room...there she is. The room is dark but as he comes closer he sees it...three breasts! And so the man absolutely has the night of his life.The next day the man walks past that same whorehouse and thinking ofthe night before and the time he had, he goes in and pays the pimpanother thousand dollars. Again, he goes up three more...
The barber was finishing a haircut on a customer one dayand started to apply some 'Aftershave Lotion' around hisears when the customer yelled, "Don't put that crap on me! My wife says it smells like a French Whorehouse!"Another customer who was waiting replied, "Hey John, youcan put the 'Aftershave Lotion' on me... My wife has neverbeen in a French Whorehouse!" Then the fun began...
Q. What does a sign on a whorehouse say in the middle of the day?
A. Beat it - we're closed.