Wrist Jokes / Recent Jokes

One night, a man on his way home happened upon a drunk, down on his hands and knees searching for something under a street light. The man asked the drunk what he was looking for so diligently and the drunk said he had tripped and his Rolex wrist watch had broken loose from his wrist. The man, being a kindhearted soul, got down on his hands and knees and began assisting the drunk looking for his watch. After about ten minutes without any success, the man asked the drunk exactly where he tripped. "About a half a block up the street," the drunk said. The man asked the drunk, "Why are you looking for your watch here if you lost it a half a block up the street?" The drunk replied, "The light is a lot better here."

Tiger, Tiger, bleeding bright
In the driveway of the night
What small Swedish hand or wrist
With a three-wood your head kissed?

What the anger, what the fire
Was so stoked by the Enquirer?
Twas there motive, twas there goal?
Did you play an extra hole?

Couldst thou not appease her
After bedding a skeezer?
Was your mom of no aid, though
Batt’ling that white tornado?

Were you chased from hearth and home
A golf club aimed at your dome?
Did the instinct come to pass
“My caddy will save my ass”?

When Elin did swing her club
Did you cower like a cub?
Did you know she’d hit a ton
And put you on the green in one?

When the impact made a thud
Wat’ring the lawn with your blood
Did she smile her work to see?
And did the pain make you pee?

And as neighbors heard your snores
Did you dream about your whores?
Complete defeat, more...

There were three guys in a hot tub, one was an asian, one was a muslim, and the other was a white guy.
They were all sitting there when the white guy heard a ringing noise and looked over to the muslim guy pushing buttons on his hand.
"hey" asked the white guy . "What are you doing?"
The muslim guy answered "oh, i got a chip put in my hand so my cell phone is planted in my hand."
"oh, thats cool, " said the white guy.
Then they were all kicking back when the white guy heard a beeping, and looked over to the asian guy pushing buttons in his wrist.
"what are you doing?" asked the white guy
"oh, i had a chip put in my wrist so my pager is planted into my wrist."
"oh thats cool, " said the white guy.
then the white guy got up to use the restroom because he had to go shit real bad.when he came back the muslim guy asked, "whats that?", "oh, " said the white guy more...