Yankee Jokes / Recent Jokes

Army will play three football games at Yankee Stadium starting in 2011. Just a scant 70 years after they were any good.

Three fans are walking to Fenway Park for the Red Sox-Yankees playoff series, when they see a foot sticking out of some bushes. An inspection revealed a dead-drunk naked woman. One man placed his Orioles baseball cap on her right breast. The Red Sox fan placed his cap on her left breast, and the Yankee fan put his over her crotch. They then called the police. The cop lifted up the Orioles cap, and made a few notes. He then lifted the Red Sox cap and made more notes. Then he lifted the Yankees cap, put it down, lifted it again and put it down. When he lifted it the third time the Yankee fan said, "What are you doing? Are you some kind of pervert, or what?" The cop said, I was just confused, usually when I see a Yankee cap, there's an asshole under it."

Mike Mooney, a Yankee was driving through the south when he decided he wanted to buy a pig. He stopped at a pig farm and told the farmer he wanted to buy a 100 pound pig. The farmer nodded, walked out into the sty, bent over and picked up a pig by its tail with his teeth. The farmer said, "This one will go a little over a 100". Astonished the Yankee said, "Who are you trying to fool? You can't weigh a pig that way". The farmer laughed and called to his young son, "Boy, come over here and weigh that pig for this man". The boy obliged by bending over and picking up the pig by its tail with his teeth. Turning to his father the boy said, " This here pig weighs about 100 pounds". The Yankee was having no part of this so in order to convince him the farmer told his son to go to the house and get his mother so she could weigh the pig. After a short delay the son returned and said, "Ma says she will be right down after she's finished weighing the more...

One day a mexican, black guy,& white guy are walking to town with a pony, trying to trade it in for a pack of bologna so that they dont starve to death. Eventually they all got tired and wanted to ride the pony. After 20 minutes arguing the white guy says that they should go to sleep and who ever has the best dream in the morning can ride the pony into town. Well the next mornig the black guy announce his dream "I dreamt I knew my daddy"
The mexican said "I dreamt I had a green card".
Then they both looked at the white guy, who broke out into a song
" Yankee Doodle went to town riding on a pony, while you fuckers were asleep I ate the bologna".