"DUMB Questions Part 2!" joke

How do they get a deer to cross at that yellow road sign? How do you get the "Keep off the Grass" sign on the grass? How do you get off a non-stop flight? How do you know when you've run out of invisible ink? How do you throw away a garbage can? How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings? How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? If a jogger runs at the speed of sound, can he still hear his Walkman? If a pig is sold to the pawn shop, is it considered a ham-hock? If a turtle lost his shell, is he homeless or naked? If athletes get athlete’s foot, do astronauts get mistletoe? If blind people wear dark glasses, why don't deaf people wear earmuffs? If corn oil is made from corn, where do we get baby oil from? If I save time, when do I get it back? If rabbits' feet are so lucky, then what happened to the rabbit? If Superman is so smart why does he wear his underpants over his trousers? If swimming is good for your shape, then why do the whales look like the way they do?

I'm hungry:

"I could eat the crotch out of a dead leper's undies."
"I could eat the horse and chase the jockey."
"So hungry I'd eat a shit sandwich, only I don't like bread."
"I could eat the arse out of a rag doll more...

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A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...

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What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.

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Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!

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Q: What is the similarity between a rubix cube and a dick?
A: The more you play with them, the harder they get!

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