"Jewish Mother Joke" joke
And it came to pass that an openly Jewish man was elected to be President of the United States of America.
So he calls his mother in Queens and invites her to come down to Washington DC to share the Passover Holliday.
She says,' I'd like to, but it's so much trouble... I mean, I have to get a cab to the airport, and I hate waiting on Queens Blvd...'
He replies,' Mom! I'm the President! You won't need a cab; I'll send a limo for you!'
To which his mother replies,' I know, but then I'll have to get my ticket at the airport, and try to get a seat on the plane, and I hate to sit in the middle... it's just too much trouble.'
He replies,' Mom! I'm the President of the United States! I'll send Air Force One or another of my private jets for you.
To which she replies,' Oh, well, but then when we land, I'll have to carry my luggage through the airport, and try to get a cab... it's really too much trouble.'
He replies,' Mom!! I'm the President! I'll send a helicopter for you! You won't have to lift a finger'
She answers,' Yes, that's nice... but, you know, I still need a hotel room, and the rooms are so expensive, and I really don't like the rooms...'
He answers,' Mom! I'm the President! You'll stay at the White House!'
She responds,' Well... all right... I guess I'll come.'
The next day, she's on the phone with her friend Betty.
Betty:' Hello, Sylvia. . . so what's new?'
Sylvia:' I'm visiting my son for Passover!'
Betty:' The doctor?'
Sylvia:' No. . . the other one.'
there were three young poly boys on a road trip a samoan a tongan and a maori .. the tongan and maori wer in the back seet while the samoan was driving ..
the samoan lost controll and of the wheel and hit a tree ... all threee polly boys died .. they all got too the gate of more...
If Ida Lupino married George Wendt, then divorced him to marry Ted Danson, divorced him to marry Alan Alda, then divorced him to marry Ted Knight, and divorced him to marry Shelly Long, she'd be Ida Wendt Danson Alda Knight Long.
If Whoopi Goldberg married Peter Cushing, more...
Boudreaux was feeling guilty, so he went to confession. "Father, I kinda took a leetle lumber from dat new construction site."
Priest: "What did you do with the lumber, my son"?
Boudreaux: "Well, Father, my porch, she's had a hole more...