Absent Jokes / Recent Jokes
These are excuse notes from parents (with their original spelling) collected by schools from all over the country: 1) My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him. 2) Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot. 3) Dear School: Please exscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29,30, 31, 32, and also 33. 4) Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating. 5) Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip. 6) John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face. 7) Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part. 8) Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins. 9) Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side. 10) Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels. 11) Please excuse Pedro from being absent yesterday. He had (diahre) (dyrea) more...
These drastic measures were inadvertently taken in notes written by parents to excuse their children's absences from school. In all fairness to pupils throughout the land, I must point out that slaughtering the English language is a practice that is not limited only to students. An astonishing number of grown-ups blithely go about murdering the King's English without any inkling that they are committing a serious crime. If you think that today's students aren't learning all they should, check out some of the writing miscreated by their moms and dads. The following are actual excuse notes received by teachers.
Dear School:
Please eckuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33. Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating. Pleazse excuse Roland from P.E. for a few day. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip. John has been absent because he had two teeth taken off his face. Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. more...
These are excuse notes from parents (with their original spelling) collected by schools from all over the country:
1) My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.
2) Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.
3) Dear School: Please exscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29,30, 31, 32, and also 33.
4) Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.
5) Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.
6) John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.
7) Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.
8) Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.
9) Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.
10) Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.
11) Please excuse Pedro from more...
*** These are actual excuse notes teachers have received, spelling mistakes included. ***
My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.
Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.
Dear School: Please ekscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33.
Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.
Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.
John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.
Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.
Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.
Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.
Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.
Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and his boots more...
*** These are actual excuse notes teachers have received, spelling mistakes included. ***
My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.
Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.
Dear School: Please ekscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also
33.
Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.
Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.
John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.
Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.
Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.
Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.
Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.
Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and his boots more...
*** These are actual excuse notes teachers have received, spelling mistakes included. ***My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.Dear School: Please ekscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also33.Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and his boots leak.Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his more...