Alike Jokes

Q: Why are men and spray paint alike?
A: One squeeze and they're all over you.

1. Why did God create woman?
-To carry semen from the bedroom to the toilet.
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2. If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true love?
-The swallow.
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3. How do you annoy your girlfriend during sex?
-Call her.
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4. Why do women fake orgasms?
-Because they think men care.
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5. What is the definition of "making love"
-Something a woman does while a guy is fucking her.
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6. What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?
-Slow down and use a lubricant.
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7. What's the difference between oral sex and anal sex?
- Oral sex makes your day. Anal sex makes your [w]HOLE weak.
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8. How many sexists does it take to change a light bulb?
-None, let the bitch cook in the dark.
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9. What's the difference between pre-menstrual tension and B. S. E?
-One's mad cow disease; the other's an agricultural more...

How are an airplane and a blonde alike?
They both have a little black box.

Q: How are women and rocks alike? A: You skip across the flat ones.

Q:How is a blonde and a screen door alike?, "Q:How is a blonde and a screen door alike? A:The harder you bang them the looser they get.