Alphabet Jokes / Recent Jokes
Questions that have Confused humankind! a.. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'llsqueeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"a.. Who was the first person to say "See that chicken there....I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's butt."a.. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to ahorrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat? a.. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer? a.. If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him? a.. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane? a.. If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat? a.. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is? a.. Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway? a.. Why does more...
From Matt Groening's "Big Book Of Hell", here are: 'Lies My Older Brother And Sister Told Me'...The Sleeping Alligator Story Older Bro/Sis: See this? He isn't stuffed, ya know. He's sleeping. You: Really? Bro/Sis: If you don't believe me, why don't you put your finger in his mouth? The Boy-Trap Warning Bro/Sis: Inside my closet, there's a little door, and behind that little door, there's a boogey-man, and he's set traps in there, little boy traps. You: Really? Bro/Sis: And they're baited with CUSTARD. You: Uh-oh.The Alphabet Trick Bro/Sis: You can come up in the tree fort if you can recite the whole alphabet. You: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y and Z. Bro/Sis: Wrong. Scram.The Yes-And-No Mind Puzzler Bro/Sis: Yes means no and no means yes. Do you want me to hit you? You: Yes! No! Yes! No! Help! The Lure Of New Toys Bro/Sis: There's some new toys for you down in the basement. You should go down there. You: But last time you shut the door and turned off the more...
Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song? The guy who wrote that song wrote everything.
One night, a mother was walking past her young daughter's room when she saw the little girl kneeling by her bed, head bowed, hands folded, reciting the alphabet.
"What are you doing, sweetheart?" the mother asked.
"I'm saying my prayers, Mommy," replied the little girl, "but I couldn't think of what I wanted to say, so I'm saying the letters of the alphabet, and God can put them together whichever way He feels is best."
One night, a mother was walking past her young daughter's room when she saw the little girl kneeling by her bed, head bowed, hands folded, reciting the alphabet.
"What are you doing, sweetheart?" the mother asked.
"I'm saying my prayers, Mommy," replied the little girl, "but I couldn't think of what I wanted to say. So, I'm saying the letters of the alphabet, and God can put them together whichever way He feels is best."
What two letters of the alphabet do snowmen prefer? I. C.!
Most USed Alphabet "A" DoeSnt Appear in SpellingS of digitS from 1 to 999. It AppearS
1St Time in 1000 then ContinueS Achievement RequireS Patience!