Arab Jokes / Recent Jokes
A rich Arab was admitted to the Lilavati Hospital in Mumbai for a heart transplant. Prior to the surgery, the doctors needed to store his blood type in case need arose. As the Arab had a rare type of blood, it couldn't be found locally. So the call went out to a number of countries. Finally a Gujarati was located who had a similar type of blood. The Gujarati willingly donated his blood for the Arab.
After the surgery, the Arab sent the Gujarati in gratitude a new Toyota Prado, diamonds, Lapiz Lazuri jewellery and US$100, 000. A year later, the Arab had to undergo corrective surgery. His doctor telephoned the Gujarati, who was more than happy to donate blood again to the Arab.
After the corrective surgery, the Arab sent the Gujarati a Thank You card and a jar of Almond halwa sweets. The Gujarati was shocked to see that the second time the Arab did not reciprocate the Gujarati's kind gesture as he had anticipated.
He phoned the Arab and asked him why more...
Two Arabs boarded a flight out of London. One took a window seat and the other sat next to him in the middle seat. Just before takeoff, an American sat down in the aisle seat. After takeoff, the American kicked his shoes off, wiggled his toes and was settling in when the Arab in the window seat said,"I need to get up and get a beer."
"Don't get up," said the American, "I'm in the aisle seat. I'll get it for you".
As soon as he left, one of the Arabs picked up the American's shoe and spat in it. When he returned with the beer, the other Arab said, "That looks good, I'd really like one, too." Again, the American obligingly went to fetch it. While he was gone the other Arab picked up his other shoe and spat in it too. When the American returned, they all sat back and enjoyed the flight. As the plane was landing, the American slipped his feet into his shoes and realized immediately what had happened. "Why does it have to be this more...
An Arab diplomat visiting the US for the first time was being wined and dined by the State Department. The Grand Emir was unused to the salt in American foods (french fries, cheeses,
salami, anchovies etc.) and was constantly sending his manservant
Abdul to fetch him a glass of water.Time and again, Abdul would scamper off and return with a glass of water, but then came the time when he returned empty-handed."Abdul, you son of an ugly camel, where is my water?" demanded the Grand Emir."A thousand pardons, O Illustrious One," stammered the poor Abdul, "but this time there is a man sitting on the well."
A catholic, a morman and an Arab were playing golf and bragging about their family.
The catholic boasted that he had 4 kids, his wife was pregnant and soon he would have his own basketball team.
The morman replied; "that's nothing, we have 10 kids. One more and I'll have a football team!!! "You guys have no vision" declared the Arab. "I have 17 wives, one more and I'll have my own 18-hole golf course!!!!"
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A hippie gets onto a bus and proceeds to sit next to a Nun in the front
seat. The Hippie looks over and asks the Nun if she would have sex with him.
The Nun, surprised by the question, politely declines and gets off at the next
stop.
When the bus starts on its way again, the bus driver says to the Hippie, "If you want, I can tell you how to get that Nun to have sex with you."
The Hippie, of course, says that he would love to know, so more...
A Jewish man sits next to two Arab men on a flight from New York to Miami. The Jewish man kicks off his shoes. Meanwhile, one of the Arabs says he would like a coke. Since he was by the aisle, the Jewish man says, "I'll get it for you," and goes off in his stockinged feet. While he was gone, one of the Arab men spit into the Jewish fellow's left shoe. Later, the other Arab man says that he too would like a coke, and the Jewish man goes off to fetch it. This time, his right shoe gets spitted into.
As the flight was ending, the Jewsih man slid his shoes back on and through his socks, he felt the squishiness. He immediately figured out what had happened and exclaimed, "When will it end!!?? When will all this enmity cease, the hatred, the anger, the spitting in shoes and the pishing in coca cola!!??"
As US tourists in Israel, a man and his wife were sitting outside a Bethlehem souvenir shop, waiting for fellow tourists. An Arab salesman approached them carrying belts. After an impassioned sales talk yielded no results, he asked where they were from. "America," the husband replied. Looking at her dark hair and olive skin, the Arab responded. "She's not from the States." "Yes I am." said the wife. He looked at her and asked. "Is he your husband?" "Yes." she replied. Turning to the husband, he offered..... "I'll give you 100 camels for her." The husband looked stunned, and there was a long silence. Finally he replied, "she's not for sale." After the salesman left, the somewhat indignant wife asked her husband what took him so long to answer, to which the husband replied, "I was trying to figure out how to get 100 camels back home."