Arizona Jokes / Recent Jokes

The Arizona Cardinals have won their first NFC Championship since 1947. Ironically enough, that was Kurt Warners rookie year.

A rancher from Central Arizona died and went on to the Great Beyond. As he approached the great gate, he noticed that the terrain was bare with no greenery. He remarked to the gate keeper, "Howdy Saint Peter. Say, this looks just like Arizona."

"The gatekeeper replied, "First of all, I'm not Saint Peter... and second, you really don't know where you are at all, do you?"

A woman just back from Arizona was telling her friends about the trip. "When my husband first saw the Grand Canyon, his face dropped a mile," she said. "Why, was he disappointed with the view?" "No, he fell over the edge."

The University of Phoenix bought the naming rights to the Arizona Cardinals' new stadium. The move will honor the Cardinals’ long tradition of mediocrity. The stadium is just like a degree from the University of Phoenix - shiny on the outside, empty on the inside.

One hundred illegal immigrants were found stranded in an Arizona desert. Despite their dehydration, the immigrants managed to turn the landscape into a veritable paradise.

This year The Frumious Bandersnatch highlights some of the more arcane or utterly worthless things you can give as a Christmas gift:
PHOTO PANTIES:
Have your picture silk screened onto your girlfriend's panties for only $19. 95. You can imagine all the creative purposes this can be put to.
YOU DON'T KNOW JACK II:
The new edition of this game is designed for know-it-alls and includes questions about subjects such as the difference between Visigoths and Ostergoths that are sure to stump them.
FREE BAJA ARIZONA BUMPER STICKERS:
We still have a supply of our non-waterproof bumper stickers that melt away at the first drop of rain. Good for use only in extremely arid regions.
WAX BULLETS:
Perfect for shooting insects inside your house, our wax bullets come in 22 and 38 caliber sizes.
LIVE TUMBLEWEEDS:
Decorate your house in Southwestern style with our live tumbleweeds. Only $44. 00.
MARS LANDERS:
NASA is offering its surplus Mars more...

On ABC's "This Week," Senator John McCain said he's "proud" of the President's leadership. McCain then asked if he was a "good boy," and wondered when the President would take him for a walk.