Barracks Jokes / Recent Jokes

Mr. Smith got himself a new secretary. She was young, pretty, sweet and polite. One day while taking dictation she noticed his fly was open. Upon leaving the room she said,' Mr. Smith, do you know your barracks door is open?'

He didn't immediately understand her remark but later on he glanced down and saw his zipper was open. He decided to have some fun with his new secretary. He called her in and asked,' By the way Miss Jones, when you saw my barracks door was open this morning, did notice the soldier standing at attention?'

' Why, no Mr. Smith,' she replied sweetly,' all I saw was a disabled veteran sitting on two old duffel bags.'

Mr. Reiss got himself a new secretary. Maggie was young, sweet and
polite.
One day while taking dictation, Maggie noticed his fly was open and, on
leaving the room, she said "Oh, Mr Reiss, did you know that your
barracks door is open?"
He did not understand her remark, but later on he happened to look
down and saw that his zipper was open. He decided to have some fun with
his new secretary. Calling her in, he asked "By the way, Miss Bolt, when
you saw my barracks door open this morning, did you see a soldier standing
at attention?"
She was quite witty. "Why, no, Mr. Reiss" she replied. "All I saw was a
disabled veteran sitting on two old duffel bags."

A Foreign Legion Captain had just been transferred to a remote desert outpost. During his orientation tour, he noticed a camel tied behind the barracks.
"Why is there a camel tied to the barracks," he asked the Sergeant who was giving him the tour.
"Well, sir," the Sergeant explained, "the men tend to get lonely sometimes since there are no women here, so we have the camel."
"Well, I suppose if it's for the men, it's all right with me," said the Captain.
A couple of months later, the Captain found he was feeling very lonely himself, so he yelled out to the Sergeant, "Bring the camel to my tent!"
The Sergeant led the camel into the Captain's tent and left. A while later, the Captain emerged, zipping up his pants and smiling.
"So, Sergeant, is that how the other men do it?" he asked.
"No, sir," the Sergeant replied, "they usually just use the camel to ride into town!"

One day a brunette, redhead, and blonde joined the army as spies. They were captured together and set up against a wall to be shot seperately. The General said they had one last word they could say before they were shot by his men with their guns ready.
The brunette yelled out "Earthquake!!!" and everyone fled to their barracks and she escaped.
The redhead yelled out "Tornadoe!!!" and everyone fled to their barracks and she escaped.
The Blonde after seeing these things happen yelled out "Fire!!!" - and was shot on the spot.

An office manager hires a new secretary. Her first day she's called into the office to take some dictation. While she's taking dictation, she notices the guy's fly is open. Not wanting to embarass her boss she says nothing until she's leaving.
At the door, she turns and says "By the way sir, your barracks door is open." He looks at her funny but she's already walked out.
A while later he happens to glance down and notice his fly is open. He decides to have a little fun with her on her first day so he calls her back into the office.
"By the way Ms. Jones, when you saw my barracks door open, did you also happen to see a soldier standing at attention?"
She replied "Why no sir! But I did see a disabled vet sitting on two old duffle bags!