Basketball Jokes / Recent Jokes

THE NBA PLAYER ADOPTION PROGRAM NEEDS YOU! With an NBA player's strike against the team owners looming, now is the time for us to show the world just how much we care. It's just not right. Hundreds of basketball players in our very own country are living at or just below the seven-figure salary level! Atrocious! And, as if that weren't bad enough, they will be deprived of pay for several weeks--possibly a whole year--as a result of the strike. But now you can help! For about two thousand dollars a day--that's less than the cost of a large screen projection TV--you can help a basketball player remain economically viable during his time of need. Two thousand dollars a day may not seem like a lot of money to you, but to a basketball player it could mean the difference between a vacation spent golfing in Florida or a Mediterranean cruise. For you, two thousand dollars is nothing more than three months rent or mortgage payments. But to a basketball player, two thousand dollars a day will more...

Shaquille O’Neal will lose his special deputy’s badge in Maricopa County because of language he used in a rap video that mocks former teammate Kobe Bryant.

I think they should have taken his badge away for not being a cop.

Several teams around the NBA have expressed interest in Dallas Mavericks wingman Josh Howard. The All-Star forward could be dealt as early as 4:20.

The basketball coach stormed into the university president's office and demanded a raise right then and there.
"Please," protested the college President, "you already make more than the entire History department."
"Yeah, maybe so, but you don't know what I have to put up with," the coach blustered. "Look."
He went out into the hall and grabbed a jock who was jogging down the hallway. "Run over to my office and see if I'm there," he ordered.
Twenty minutes later the jock returned, sweaty and out of breath.
"You're not there, sir," he reported.
"Oh, I see what you mean," conceded the President, scratching his head. "I would have phoned."

The NBA and its locked-out referees are close to an agreement. Both sides agree that the Knicks are awful.

A woman is picked up by a basketball player in a bar. They like each other and she goes back with him to his hotel room. He removes his shirt and she sees that on his arm is a tattoo which reads Reebok. She thinks that's a bit odd and asks him about it.

He says, "When I play basketball, the cameras pick up the tattoo and Reebok pays me for the advertisement."

A bit later, his pants are off and she sees Puma tattooed on his leg. He gives the same explanation for the unusual tattoo. Finally, the underwear comes off and she sees the word Aids tattooed on his penis. She jumps back with shock. "I'm not going to do it with a guy who has Aids!"

He says, "It's cool baby...in a minute it's going to say Adidas.

Houston Rockets' star center 7'6" Yao Ming married longtime girlfriend – and basketball player for the Chinese national women's team – 6'2" Ye Li at a posh hotel in his hometown of Shanghai on Monday, reports the Associated Press.

-----------------------------------------------------

For their honeymoon they will take on Godzilla