Benign Jokes

Questions and answers selected from tests in Springdale, Arkansas in 2000 to 16 year old students! (Don't laugh too hard - one of these may be the president someday.)
Q: Name the four seasons. A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink. A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
Q: How is dew formed? A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
Q: What is a planet? A: A body of earth surrounded by sky.
Q: What causes the tides in the oceans? A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.
Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections? A: Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets a election.
Q: What are steroids? A: more...

Teacher to a blonde: What does the word "benign" mean?
Blonde: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.

Benign is what you'll be after you're be eight.

A glossary of Medical Terms, and alternate meanings as given by Sardars
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Benign................ What you be after you be eight.
Artery................ The study of paintings.
Bacteria.............. Back door to cafeteria.
Barium................ What doctors do when patients die.
Cesarean Section...... A neighborhood in Rome.
Catscan............... Searching for kitty.
Cauterize............. Made eye contact with her.
Colic................. A sheep dog.
Coma.................. A punctuation mark.
D & C................. Where Washington is.
Dilate................ To live long.
Enema................. Not a friend.
Fester................ Quicker than someone else.
Fibula................ A small lie.
Genital............... Non-Jewish person.
G. I. Series........... World Series of military baseball.
Hangnail.............. What you more...