Bill Clinton Jokes / Recent Jokes
One afternoon, Bill Clinton was sitting in his office when his telephone rang.
"Hello Mr. Clinton," a heavily accented voice says. "This is Bholaji. I am ringing to inform you that I am officially declaring war on you!" Well, Bholaji," Bill replies, "This indeed is important news! Tell me, how big is your army?" At this moment in time," says Bholaji after a moments calculation, "There is myself, my cousin Herolal, my next door neighbor Pyarelal and the entire Kabbadi team from the Village. That makes 8!" Bill sighs and says, "I must tell you Bholaji that I have 1 million men in my army waiting to move on my word." OK," says Bholaji. "I'll have to ring you back!" Sure enough, the next day Bholaji calls back. "Right Mr. Clinton, the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some equipment!" "What equipment would that be, Bholaji?" Bill asks. Well, we have 2 combine harvesters, a more...
Bill Clinton said he is very familiar with Haiti customs and tradtions. Right after the Monica Lewisnsky affair, Hillary purchased a voodoo doll in his likeness.
NEW YORK: Scientists say they have produced embryos that are clones of two men, a potential step toward developing scientifically valuable stem cells.
The Bill Clinton and Al Gore clone will be the first black-bionic, presidential candidate.
Mahathir was so disappointed with his cabinet for being inefficient and corrupt that he decided to call on Goh Chok Tong and ask him how he managed to have such an efficient and incorruptible cabinet. On hearing Mahathir's woes, PM Goh said,' Simple, Mahathir, I choose able men for my cabinet.' Mahathir asked,' Yes, but how do you know that they are able?' PM Goh replied,' Just ask them simple questions to test their intelligence. They don't need to be too difficult. Let me illustrate to you.' Just then, Tony Tan was walking by, PM Goh called out to him,' Hey Tony, come over here.' Tony obediently walked briskly over. PM Goh asked,' Tell me, Tony, who is your father's son? ' Tony Tan immediately replied,' Me! Of course.' PM Goh turned to Mahathir and said,' See, all my ministers can answer this question. Why don't you go back and try.' Mahathir thank PM Goh and left. Once he was back, he immediately summoned Anwar, his deputy, and shot the question at him,' Tell me, Anwar, who is your more...
Bill Clinton was very angry with Mahathir's sudden charges against Anwar, so he demanded that they (Mahathir and Anwar) come to the pentagon to explain themselves before the UN. At that time it was snowing, and Mahathir's wife had never seen snow before, so she asked him to let her come along too. Mahathir insisted that she didn't, but she was so earnest that Mahathir only agreed to it if she would spend a night with him in bed.
The next day, three of them left for Washington DC. After a heated discussion with the delegates, Mahathir stepped out into the snow, only to smell the smell of human urine somewhere in the distance. He found the source, and was shocked to find it was from words written in pee in the snow, saying' Mahathir is a dickhead' He was outraged and demanded that experts from the US immediately analyze the samples to determine the anti-Mahathir person. Before long, the samples came back.
'Mr Mahathir,' a detective said,' We have good news and bad news for more...
Nobel Prize-winning author Toni Morrison, who described Bill Clinton as the U.S.'s "first black president" a decade ago, has announced her support for Barack Obama.
In other news, Ms. Morrison is the recipient of a successful eye transplant.
On the anniversary of 9/11, former Clinton aides are outraged over the docu-drama that aired on ABC. The "film" placed partial blame at the feet of then President Bill Clinton.
"We aren't in support of a jaded film that does nothing but spew lies and half-truths."
"Well, except this one."