Chelsea Jokes / Recent Jokes
Q: Why did Bill and Hillary send Chelsea to a private school?
A: If they sent her to a public school, the secret service would be out-gunned!
Hillary Clinton, Chelsea Clinton, and Bill Clinton are sitting in ahelicopter and Bill starts to think. He sits there for about 15 minutesand finally Hillary asks why he is looking so sad. He says, "I just was wondering what I could do for the poor countries." "Well " says Chelsea, "you could throw $100, 000 out the window of thehelicopter. I'm sure that the poor will get some of it." He agrees that it's a good idea and he does. About 5 minutes later he starts thinking again. Hillary asks "Why do you still look so sad? You just threw $100, 000 outthe window of the helicopter. That helped a lot of poor people." He says "I still feel like I didn't do enough." She says "Well, Bill, why don't you throw another $100, 000 out thewindow? That should make a lot of people happy." Again he says it's a good idea and he does. A few moments later and again he looks unhappy and he says "I stilldon't think I've done enough." This more...
Hillary Clinton, Chelsea Clinton, and Bill Clinton are sitting in a helicopter and Bill starts to think. He sits there for about 15 minutes and finally Hillary asks why he is looking so sad.
He says, "I just was wondering what I could do for the poor countries."
"Well " says Chelsea, "you could throw $100, 000 out the window of the helicopter. I'm sure that the poor will get some of it."
He agrees that it's a good idea and he does. About 5 minutes later he starts thinking again.
Hillary asks "Why do you still look so sad? You just threw $100, 000 out the window of the helicopter. That helped a lot of poor people."
He says "I still feel like I didn't do enough."
She says "Well, Bill, why don't you throw another $100, 000 out the window? That should make a lot of people happy."
Again he says it's a good idea and he does. A few moments later and again more...
Top Ten Things Overheard in the White House
10. Socks just has to go on a very long vacation, that's all.
9. Dad, who are those people on the lawn trying to look through my windows?
8. How many times have your father and I told you not to tickle the man
with the briefcase handcuffed to his wrist, young lady?
7. We all would have liked for your friend to come over to play, Chelsea,
but she's a foreign national.
6. I'm sorry the secret service guard wouldn't let you kiss your date,
honey, but he was just being careful.
5. No, I can't come to school for career day, Chelsea.
4. That's MY chair, Hillary.
3. Chelsea, just because your mother and I smoke it doesn't mean you can.
2. Because I'm the President, THAT'S why.
1. My dad? He's taking a nap, President Yeltsin. Can I take a message?
Hillary and Chelsea were having a deep dish heartto heart talk about Chelsea's college experiences. Hillary: So have you found dating to be fullflling experience? Chelsea: It's okay.. but i don't like how the boys sometimes act like real sex hounds. Hillary: Well, uh, have you, uh, actually had sex? Chelsea: Well Mom, no, not IF you define sex the way Daddy does.
When Chelsea Clinton was young she walked in on her mom getting out of the
shower. Pointing to her chest she asked her "What are those?"
Hiliary's response was "Oh honey, those are my breasts."
Chelsea asked "Will I get breasts?"
"Yes, when you're older." said Hillary.
A day or two later Chelsea walked in on her dad getting out of the shower.
Pointing towards his penis, she asked "What's that?"
Bill responded "Oh honey, that's my penis."
Chelsea asked "Will I get a penis?"
Bill responded, "Yes, when your mother leaves."
Bill, Hillary and Chelsea Clinton are on Air Force One. Bill says to Hillary, "I could make a lot of people very happy if I threw 1 million $1 bills out of this plane." Hillary says, "Oh yeah, well I could make even more people happy if I threw 1 million $5 bills out of this plane." Chelsea says, "I could make the whole world happy if I threw you both out of this plane!"