Condom Jokes / Recent Jokes

What's the difference between a condom and a cockpit?
You can only fit one dick in a condom.

Little Johnny walked into his dad's bedroom one day only catch him sitting on the side of his bed sliding a condom onto his dick in preparation of fucking his wife. Johnny's father in attempt to hide his full erection with a condom on it bent over as if to look under the bed. Little Johnny asked curiously "What ya doin' dad?"His father qiuckly replied "I thought I saw a rat go underneath the bed.", to which Little Johnny replied "What ya gonna do, fuck him?"

Two
old ladies were outside their nursing home, having a
smoke, when it started to rain. One of the ladies pulled
out a condom, cut off the end, put it over her cigarette,
and continued smoking.
Lady 1: "What's that?"
Lady 2: "A condom. This way my cigarette doesn't
get wet."
Lady 1: "Where did you get it?"
Lady 2: "You can get them at any drugstore."
The next day, Lady 1 hobbles herself into the local
drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she
wants a box of condoms. The guy, obviously embarrassed,
looks at her strangely (she is, after all, over 80
years old), but very delicately asks what brand she
prefers.
"Doesn't matter son, as long as it fits a Camel."
The pharmacist fainted

1- Nike Condoms: Just do it.
2- Toyota Condoms: Oh what a feeling.
3- Diet Pepsi Condoms: You got the right one, baby.
4- Pringles Condoms: Once you pop, you can't stop.
5- Mentos Condoms: The freshmaker.
6- Flintstones Vitamins Condom Pack: Ten millon strong and growing.
7- Secret Condoms: Strong enough for a man, but Ph balanced for a
woman.
8- Macintosh Condoms: It does more, it costs less, its that simple.
9- Ford Condoms: The best never rest.
10- Chevy Condoms: Like a rock.
11- Dial Condoms: Aren't you glad you use it? Don't you wish
everybody did?
12- New York Lotto Condoms: Cause hey-- you never know.
13- California Lotto Condoms: Who's next?
14- Avis Condoms: Trying harder than ever.
15- EverReady Condoms: Keeps going and going.
16- KFC Condoms: Finger-Licking Good.
17- Coca Cola Condoms: Always a Real Thing.
18- Lays Condoms: Betcha can't have just one.
19- Cambells Soup more...

Which condom would you use.... Nike Condoms: Just do it. Toyota Condoms: Oh what a feeling. Diet Pepsi Condoms: You got the right one, baby. Pringles Condoms: Once you pop, you can't stop. Mentos Condoms: The freshmaker. Flintstones Vitamins Condom Pack: Ten million strong and growing. Secret Condoms: Strong enough for a man, but made for a woman. Macintosh Condoms: It does more, it costs less, its that simple. Ford Condoms: The best never rest. Chevy Condoms: Like a rock. Dial Condoms: Aren't you glad you use it? Don't you wish everybody did? New York Lotto Condoms: Cause hey-- you never know. California Lotto Condoms: Who's next? Avis Condoms: Trying harder than ever. KFC Condoms: Finger-Licking Good. Coca Cola Condoms: Always a Real Thing. Lays Condoms: Betcha can't have just one. Cambells Soup Condoms: Mm, mm good. The Carl's Jr. Condom: If it doesn't get all over the place, it doesn't belong in your face... General Electric: We bring good things to life! AT&T condom:' Reach out more...

Q: What do a condom and a coffin have in common
A: Both hold stiffs.

Q: What do a coffin and a condom have in common? A: They're both filled with stiffs, one's coming, one's going.