Disgrace Jokes / Recent Jokes

Grandaughter informed grandma that she has just found her first boyfriend and they have a date on the next Saterday.Grandma said "on this first date your boyfriend is going to kiss you and you are going to like it, thereafter he is going to fondle your breast and you are going to like it, the emotions will rise very fast and he may end up on top of you doing exactly what you must never do because you will disgrace our family.Listen my child never ever agree that this boy must disgrace our family.Grandaughter agreed and made a concrete promise that things will never be alowed to go that far.Back from the date Grandaughter explained to grandma that everything went exactly as she predicted but when the time came that the boy must be on top, she just flipped him over and she got on top to disgrace his family. Grandma fainted.

Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job. -Douglas Adams, "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy"
If you give Congress a chance to vote on both sides of an issue, it will always do it. -Les Aspin, D., Wisconsin
Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country. -Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, D.C.
Alliance, n.: In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other's pocket that they cannot separately plunder a third.
-Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Boundary, n.: In political geography, an imaginary line between two nations, separating the imaginary rights of one from the imaginary rights of another. -Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Peace, n.: In international affairs, a period of cheating between two periods of fighting. -Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's more...

Young Ahmed Ben Bella loved all kinds of beans, and this understandably gave him embarrassing problems with flatulence. Out in the desert this did not matter - except to his camel, who sometimes dragged his nose in the sand after one of Ahmed Ben Bella's more worthy efforts. But, in his village Ahmed Ben Bella often brought shame upon himself and his family when he could not control himself.
One day Ahmed Ben Bella felt a mighty fart coming on. He was in the middle of the marketplace and made every effort to get through the great throng so as to not disgrace himself. But, as fate would have it, Ahmed Ben Bella's efforts were for naught. And, it was a mighty fart indeed: it blew over several of the shopkeepers stalls and dropped no fewer than three donkeys to their knees.
There was nothing to do but leave his home village in disgrace, and for fifty years Ahmed Ben Bella roamed the earth, hoping that the shame he had brought down upon himself would be forgotten. Finally, as an more...

A blonde virgin told her grandmother that she was finally going out on her very first date.
Her grandmother said, "Sit here and let me tell you about those young boys. He is going to try to kiss you; you are going to like that, but don't let him do it."
She continued, "He is going to try to feel your breast; you are going to like that, but don't let him do that. He is going to try to put his hand between your legs; you are going to like that, but don't let him do that either."
Then the grandmother said, "But, most importantly, he is going to try to get on top of you and have his way with you. You are going to like that, but don't let him do that. It will disgrace the family."
With that bit of advice in mind, the granddaughter went on her date and could not wait to tell her grandmother about it.
The next day she told her grandmother that her date went just as the old lady said.
She said, "But, grandmother, you can be very proud more...