Feeds Jokes

A ventriloquist was driving through farm country one day when his car breaks down. He walks up to a nearby farm and asks the farmer if he can call a tow truck. The farmer said sure and the call was made. While waiting for the truck to arrive the ventriloquist asks the farmer for a tour. The farmer says sure thing and off they go. The first pen they come to is the pigs. The ventriloquist decides to have a little fun and throws his voice into the pig pen. As they are standing there the guy asks the pig "Pig how does the farmer here treat ya"? the pig replies "Well he feeds me garbage, but that's ok. He may end up eating one day but that's ok too" The farmer looks agast at the pig and says "Well that durn pig has never done that before" The ventriloquist smiles. The next pen they come to is the Horse stable. The Guy turns to the horse and asks "Mr. Horse, how is your life around this farm"? The horse says "Well he hooks me up to a plow and more...

Harry starts his new job at the zoo and he is given three tasks, the first is to clear the exotic fish pool of weeds. Harry starts on this when suddenly a bloody great fish leaps out and bites him. Harry is not going to let a fish have a go so he beats the offending fish to death. Upon doing so he realises that his boss is not going to be best pleased, so Harry tries to think of a way to hide the dead fish. He hits on the brilliant idea of giving the fish to the lions as lions will eat anything, so Harry feeds the fish to the lions.

Harry then moves on to his second job, which is to clearout the monkey house. Harry gets stuck in and a couple of chimps start throwing shit at him. Harry is not amused and bashes the chimps with his spade, killing them instantly. Harry is shitting himself, so what does he do? he feeds the chimps to the lions, because lions eat anything.

Anyway, Harry moves on to his last job, which is to collect honey from some South American bees. more...