Frank Jokes / Recent Jokes
Every night, Frank would go down to the liquor store, get a six-pack, bring it home, and drink it while he watched TV. One night, as he finished his last beer, the doorbell rang. He stumbled to the door and found a six-foot cockroach standing there. The bug grabbed him by the collar and threw him across the room, then left.
The next night, after he finished his 4th beer, the doorbell rang. He walked slowly to the door and found the same six-foot cockroach standing there. The big bug punched him in the stomach, then left.
The next night, after he finished his 1st beer, the doorbell rang again. The same six-foot cockroach standing there. This time he was knee'd in the groin and hit behind the ear as he doubled over in pain. Then he left.
The fourth night Frank didn't drink at all. The doorbell rang. The six-foot cockroach standing there. The bug beat the snot out of Frank and left him in a heap on the living room floor. The following day, Frank went to more...
A lady goes to her priest one day and says, "Father, I have a problem. I have two female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing."
"What do they say?" the priest inquired.
"They say, `Hi, we`re hookers! Do you want to have some fun?`"
"That`s obscene!" the priest exclaimed, and then, he thought for a moment.
"You know," he said, "I may have a solution to your problem. I have two male talking parrots, which I have taught to pray and read the Bible. Bring your two parrots over to my house, and we`ll put them in the cage with Frank and Jacob. My parrots can teach your parrots to pray and worship, and your parrots are sure to stop saying that horrible thing-in no time at all."
"Thank you," the woman responded, "this may very well be the solution to my
problem."
The next day, she brought her female parrots to the priest`s house. As more...
Frank came into his wife's room one day. "If I were, say, disfigured, would you still love me?" he asked her.
"Darling, I'll always love you," she said calmly, filing her nails.
"How about if I became crippled and couldn't make love to you any more?" he asked nervously.
"Don't worry, darling, I'll always love you," she told him, buffing her nails.
"Well, how about if I lost my job as vice president?" Frank went on, "if I weren't pulling in six figures any more. Would you still love me then?"
The woman looked over at her husband's worried face. "Frank, I'll always love you," she reassured him, "but most of all, I'll really miss you."
This guy was lonely and so he decided life would be more fun if he had a pet.
So he went to the pet store and told the owner that he wanted to buy an unusual pet. After some discussion, he finally bought a centipede (100-legged bug), which came in a little white box.
He took the box back home, found a good location for the box, and decided he would start off by taking his new pet to the bar to have a drink.
So he asked the centipede in the box, "
Would you like to go to Frank's with me and have a beer?"
But there was no answer from his new pet. This bothered him a bit, but he waited a few minutes and then asked him again, "
How about going to the bar and having a drink with me?"
But again, there was no answer from his new friend and pet.
So he waited a few minutes more, thinking about the situation. He decided to ask him one more time; this time putting his face up against the centipede's house and shouting, "
Hey, in more...
This guy was lonely, and decided life would be more fun if he had a pet. So he went to the pet store and told the owner he wanted to buy an unusual pet. After some discussion, he finally bought a centipede, which came in a little white box to use for his house. He took the box back home, found a good location for the box, and decided he would start off by taking his new pet to the bar to have a drink.
So he asked the centipede in the box, Would you like to go to Frank's with me for a beer? But there was no answer from his new pet. This bothered him a bit, but he waited a few minutes and then asked him again, How about going to the bar and having a drink with me?
But again there was no answer from his new friend and pet. So he waited a few more minutes, thinking about the situation and he decided to ask him one more time! This time, putting his face up against the centipede's little house he shouted, HEY, IN THERE, WOULD YOU LIKE TO GO TO FRANK'S PLACE AND HAVE A DRINK WITH more...
One evening, Frank was drinking at a bar when the bartender came over to tell Frank that he had a telephone call.Frank had just bought another beer and he didn't want anyone else to drink it. So, Fred wrote a little sign and left it by his beer that read: "I spit in my beer."When Fred returned to his bar stool, there was another note beside his beer: "I spit in your beer, too!"
Why won't cannibals eat Frank Sinatra? Because he's always coming back!