Fridge Jokes / Recent Jokes

> > > Answers to Life's Questions About Men
> > > =====================================
> > >
> > >
> > > What did God say after creating man?
> > > I must be able to do better than that.
> > >
> > > What did God say after creating Eve?
> > > "Practice makes perfect."
> > >
> > > How are men and parking spots alike?
> > > All the good ones are always taken. Free ones are mostly handicapped
> > > or extremely small.
> > >
> > > What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common?
> > > They're married.
> > >
> > > Why are married women heavier than single women?
> > > Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.
> > > Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
> > >
> > > What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
> > > A widow.
> > >
> > > Man says to God: "God, why did more...

Allegedly a letter to the Home Economist:

SIR:

Mr. Gates' arguments may also be applied to the electricity utility business. If I were the head of Gates Gas & Electric, the first thing I would do is declare that we sell energy systems, not power, and that customers tell us that they want a familiar energy environment wherever they go

The first step would be to integrate a smart fridge into the overall energy system as it is the first appliance opened by most users and real-time monitoring of beer temperature increases satisfaction with the energy environment for 78% of all customers

Customers would be free to use other fridges, even making someone else's their default appliance. However, if they try to remove the Gas & Electric fridge their television and air conditioner might not function properly. When a circuit fails in an older home we would repair it with a' service pack' that also installs our fridge, eventually introducing all more...

Q: How many elephants can you fit in a VW?
A: Four. Two in front, two in back.
Q: How can you tell if you have an elephant in your fridge?
A: All the Jell-o is gone
Q: How can you tell if you have two elephants in your fridge?
A: All the Jell-o is gone, and there's tracks in the butter
Q: How can you tell if you have three elephants in your fridge?
A: All the Jell-o is gone, there's tracks in the butter, and the roast is half eaten.
Q: How can you tell if there are four elephants in your fridge?
A: There's a VW parked out front.

What do you do if your boyfriend walks out?
: Close the door.
When do you care for a man's company?
: When he owns it.
How many men does it take to wallpaper a bathroom?
: Three, if you slice them very thinly.
Why do men get married?
: So they don't have to hold their stomachs in anymore.
What are a woman's four favorite animals?
: A mink in the closet, a Jaguar in the garage, a tiger
in the bedroom, and an ass to pay for it all.
How do you get a man to do sit-ups?
: Put the remote control between his toes.
Why are dumb blonde jokes so short?
: So men can remember them.
What did God say after creating man?
: I must be able to do better than that.
What did God say after she made Eve?
:"Practice makes perfect."
What's the difference between men and government
bonds?
: Bonds mature.
What is the one thing that all men at singles bars
have in common?
: They're more...

Q. Why are married women heavier than single women?

A. Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed, and they go to the fridge.

Mohan: What Do The Fridge Tell If U Stand Front Of Fridge

Shyam: Cool Inside Fool Outside.

When does a woman care for a man's company?
When he owns it.
How many men does it take to wallpaper a bathroom?
Three, if you slice them very thinly.
Why do men get married?
So they don't have to hold their stomachs in anymore.
What are a woman's four favorite animals?
A mink in the closet, a Jaguar in the garage, a tiger in the bedroom,
and an ass to pay for it all.
How do you get a man to do sit-ups?
Put the remote control between his toes.
Why are dumb blonde jokes so short?
So men can remember them.
What did God say after creating man?
I must be able to do better than that.
What did God say after creating Eve?
"Practice makes perfect."
What's the difference between men and government bonds?
Bonds mature.
What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common?
They're married.
Why do men buy electric lawn mowers?
So they can find their way back to the more...