Gigantic Jokes

Special 1-hour lenses from Lenscrafters now allow it to see really, REALLY, *REALLY* far.
SBTS (Shapely Buttocks Targeting System) enhances astronomers' lonely evenings.
New Super Big Gulp size cup holder and one of those little pine tree air fresheners.
When pointed toward earth, it can... HEY, YOU!!! IN THE RED SHIRT! STOP PICKING YOUR NOSE!
Bitchin' speaker stacks that blast "We Will Rock You" when orbiting over Iraq.
Special kaleidoscope attachment for when the acid kicks in.
After 3 years and over $50 million of troubleshooting, they finally removed the lens cap.
Warning on lens mirror now reads: "OBJECTS IN MIRROR ARE LIGHTYEARS CLOSER THAN THEY APPEAR."
Gigantic Louisville Slugger installed to protect earth against asteroids.
"Toy Surprise" built into every new piece, for that day when they plummet to Earth.
By focusing huge magnifying glass, scientists can burn ants with pinpoint accuracy.
Much improved more...

A guy told a group of his friends about the fantastic steak he had eating in a downtown restaurant the day before. They all decided to head down to the restaurant to see if it was really as great as he was making it out to be.
The group entered the restaurant and were seated at a table in the back section. After looking over the menu, they ordered and anxiously awaited their delicious, gigantic steaks.
To their collective disappointment, the waitress brought them the smallest steaks they had ever seen.
Embarrassed, the guy called the waitress over and said, "Now listen here! Yesterday I came in here and you brought me the biggest, juiciest, most delicious steak I have ever had. Today, when I have all my friends here, you serve us these miniature steaks. What is the meaning of this?"
"Yesterday, sir, you were sitting by the window!" replied the waitress.

A man was new in town and caught the flu, so he went to see a doctor. The doctor gave him three prescriptions. Before the man left the doctor's office, he asked for directions to the nearest pharmacy. The doctor said, "Go six blocks down and you will see a pharmacy on the left hand side."
The man followed the doctor's directions and had no trouble finding the pharmacy. As he got out of his car, he noticed a gigantic sign which read: "The Giant Pharmacy where you get more for your money."
He walked in and gave the pharmacist the three prescriptions. When his name was called, he noticed that the clerk placed a gigantic container of antibiotics on the counter, then had trouble picking up a huge bottle of cough syrup.
The man became alarmed, and before the clerk walked away to bring the third prescription, he yelled "Excuse me sir... the suppositories... I don't want them!!"

What do you call a gigantic polar bear? Nothing, you just run away!