Hoon Jokes

A Sardar travelling on an overnight train to Punjab requests the conductor before retiring
"phaji - Ludhiana savere panj vaje aavega - mainu uthe jaroor utha dena interview lai jana hai. Main Kumbkaran de neend sonda hoon, jarurat pade taan jabardasti utar dena.
Sardarji wakes up to the sounds of "chai chai" in Amritsar, looks at time - 8. 30 AM. He has missed his interview and is very pissed off, finds the conductor and starts swearing at him in the choicest Punjabi galis. This carries on for about 10 minutes. Another passenger says to the Conductor: -
"ye Sardar ji aap ko maa bahen ki galiya nikaal rahen hain aur aap hain ke sharafat se sune ja rahe hain"
"bhai sahib " responds the conductor "main enke galiyan to sun he nahin raha hoon. Mujhe to un Sardarji ke galiyaan sun rahi hain jinko maine Ludhaine main utaar deya.

husband......
jab mai suit pahan kar jaatha hoon tho dookaandaar mujhe sabji mahenga detha hai... par jab maile kurthe paijaame mai jaatha hoon tho sasthe detha ha.....
wife.....
tho tum kal se katora le kar jaana.... mufth mai dega....

Santa: "Hi, Main Bol Raha Hoon".
Banta: "Kamaal Hain, Ithe Vi Main Bol Raha Hoon!"

Teacher-Do You Know The Meaning Of Tamsomajyotirgamay. Student-Yes, Tum So Jao Ma Main Jyoti Ke Ghar Ja Raha Hoon.

Aik aadmi jungle se guzar raha tha
A Churail stops him & says:
Hoo Hoo Haa Ha Ha, mai Churail hoon,
Aadmi: janta hoon, teri 1 behan mere ghar main hai.