Interpreted Jokes / Recent Jokes
Rules that guys wished girls knew..........
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it's up put it down.
3. Don't cut your hair. Ever.
4. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see
if he can find the perfect present, again!
5. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an
answer you don't want to hear.
6. Sometimes, he's not thinking about you. Live with it.
7. Don't ask him what he's thinking about unless you are prepared
to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation and
monster trucks.
8. Get rid of your cat. And no, it's not different, it's just like
every other cat.
9. Dogs are better than ANY cats. Period.
10. Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the
tides. Let it be.
11. Shopping is not sport.
12. Anything you wear is fine. Really.
13. You have enough more...
The Godfather, accompanied by his attorney, walked into a room to meet with his accountant.
The Godfather asked the accountant, "Where''s the three million bucks you embezzled from me?"
The accountant didn''t answer.
The Godfather asked again, "Where''s the three million bucks you embezzled from me?"
The attorney interrupted, "Sir, the man is a deaf-mute and cannot understand you, but I can interpret for you."
The Godfather said, "Well, ask him where the @#!* money is."
The attorney, using sign language, asked the accountant where the three million dollars was.
The accountant signed back, "I don''t know what you''re talking about."
The attorney interpreted to the Godfather, "He doesn''t know what you''re talking about."
The Godfather pulled out a pistol, put it to the temple of the accountant, cocked the trigger and said, more...
The Godfather, accompanied by his attorney, walked into a room to meet with his accountant.
The Godfather asked the accountant, "Where's the three million bucks you embezzled from me?"
The accountant didn't answer.
The Godfather asked again, "Where's the three million bucks you embezzled from me?"
The attorney interrupted, "Sir, the man is a deaf-mute and cannot understand you, but I can interpret for you."
The Godfather said, "Well, ask him where the @#!* money is."
The attorney, using sign language, asked the accountant where the three million dollars was.
The accountant signed back, "I don't know what you're talking about."
The attorney interpreted to the Godfather, "He doesn't know what you're talking about."
The Godfather pulled out a pistol, put it to the temple of the accountant, cocked the trigger and said, "Ask him again where the @#!* money is!"
The attorney signed more...
Subject: Truth in Advertising
List of Abbreviations in the WOMEN SEEKING MEN Classifieds
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CODE WORD INTERPRETED AS:
40-ish 48
Adventurer Has had more partners than you ever will
Affectionate Possessive
Artist Unreliable
Athletic Flat chested
Average looking Ugly
Beautiful Pathological liar
Commitment-minded Pick out curtains, now!
Communication important Just try to get a word in edgewise
Contagious Smile Bring your penicillin
Educated College dropout
Emotionally Secure Medicated
Employed Has part-time job stuffing envelopes at home
Enjoys art and opera Snob
Enjoys Nature Bring your own granola
Exotic Beauty Would frighten a Martian
Feminist Fat; ball buster
Financially Secure One paycheck from the street
Free spirit Substance user
Friendship first Trying to live down reputation as more...