Jogging Jokes / Recent Jokes

Larry, a local football star, is jogging down the street when he sees abuilding on fire. A lady is standing on a third story ledge holding herpet cat in her arms."Hey, lady," yells Larry, "Throw me the cat.""No," she cries, "It's too far.""I play football, I can catch him."The smoke is pouring from the windows, and finally, the woman waves toLarry, kisses her cat goodbye, and tosses it down to the street.Larry keeps his eye on the cat as it comes hurtling down toward him.The feline bounces off an awning and Larry runs into the street to catchit. He jumps six feet into the air and makes a spectacular one handedcatch. The crowd that has gathered to watch the fire breaks intocheers.Larry does a little dance, lifts the cat above his head, wiggles hisknees back and forth, then spikes the cat into the pavement.

Hillary Clinton was out jogging one morning when she came across a little boy who had a box of newborn puppies. After stopping and introducing herself, Hillary asked the little boy what kind of puppies they were.
"They're Democrats," the little boy replied.
Hillary was very pleased to hear this and when she got home she told her husband what had happened.
A week or so later, Bill was out jogging and came across a little boy carrying a box puppies. Recalling what Hillary had told him, Bill went up to the little boy and asked, "Are these the puppies you showed my wife Hillary a week or so ago?"
"Yes, they are," answered the boy. "They're Republicans."
Surprised by the answer, Bill inquired, "I thought you had told my wife they were Democrats?"
"Yes, just after they were born they were Democrats, but now their eyes are open!"

Similarities BRA and BAR
Both are drinking joints. Both have restriction time on closing and opening timings Both are flashy. When open, both drive men mad.
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Why women wear undergarments with flowers printed on them?
To pay tribute to men who got buried under them
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Why was the sardar arrested in the political rally?
Because he saw a lady journalist going with a badge on her chest which said' PRESS' and he did
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There are 3 Male and 1 Female pencils in a box.
The Female pencil got pregnant! !
Which Male pencil is responsible?
THE ONE WITHOUT THE RUBBER
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Three Roosters: normal, retarded and a gay.
Normal: cock-a-doodle-dooo! !!
Retarded: doodle-cock-a-dooo! !!
Gay: any-cock-will more...

Bill Clinton was out for his morning jog when he saw a hooker. As he was passing her, he said, "20 bucks".
"Not a chance," she replied.
The next morning Bill and Hillary were both out jogging together when they saw the same hooker.
As they were jogging by, she yelled out, "See what 20 bucks gets you?"

Bill Clinton was out jogging one morning when he came across a prostitute at an intersection. He asked her what she would charge for an evening.
She replyed that she charges $150 dollars. Bill then asked if she would spend the evening for $10.
She said no and Bill jogged away.
The next day Bill was out jogging with Hillary. The prostitute was back at the same intersection.
As Bill and Hillary passed the intersection the prostitute called out "Well thats what you get for $10".