Jogging Jokes / Recent Jokes

George Bush went jogging one morning and came upon the Washington monument. He said, "George, what should I do?" After a few seconds George replied, "Abolish the IRS and start over." George thought about this for a few seconds and continued jogging.
Shortly he came upon the Jefferson Memorial and stopped. He said "Tom, what should I do?" After a few seconds Tom replied, "Abolish welfare and start over."
George continued jogging after thinking about this and came upon the Lincoln Memorial. He said, "Abe, what should I do?" After a few seconds Abe replied "Why don't you take the night off and go to the theater?"

President Clinton was on his usuall jog for the day when he saw a little boy who had several puppies with him. The President asked him what their names where, the little boy said their names are DEMOCRATICS. The Pres. said oh what great namews for the puppies.
So the next day president Clinton went jogging with his duaghter Chelse so that she could see the puppies and when they came up to the little boy, the president told him to tell Chelse the puppies names; and the little boy replied thier names are REPUBLICANS.
Then the president said "you told me yesterday that thier were DEMOCRATICS", and the little said yeah that was yesterday when their eyers were closed, but today theire opened.

Clinton is out jogging around in some of the seedier areas of Washington D.C. He
notices a good looking prostitute. She sees this and calls out, "Fifty dollars!"
He is tempted, but the price is a little high. So he calls back, "Five!"
She is disappointed and turns away, and Bill continues his jog.
A few days later, he finds himself jogging in the same area and as luck would
have it, the prostitute is still there. But she doesn't want to come down on her
price. "Fifty!" she shouts.
Bill answers, "Five!" No sale.
About a week later, Hillary has decided that she wants to get in shape, so she
demands to go jogging with Bill. They get to the seedy part of town and the same
prostitute is still there. She eyes Bill and Hillary together and yells, "See
what you get for five dollars!"

Clinton is out jogging around in some of the seedier areas of Washington D.C. He notices a good looking prostitute. She sees this and calls out: "Fifty dollars!" He is tempted, but the price is a little high. So he calls back: "Five!" She is disappointed and turns away and Bill continues his jog.
A few days later, he finds himself jogging in the same area and as luck would have it, the prostitute is still there. But she want not come down on her price. "Fifty!" she shouts and Bill answers her: "Five!" No sale.
About a week later, Hillary has decided that she wants to get into shape so she demands to go jogging with Bill. They get to the seedy part of town and the same prostitute is still there. She eyes Bill and Hillary together and yells: "See what you get for five dollars!"

ADVICE FROM THE ANCIENTS.....

Bill Clinton went jogging one morning last week to clear his head and think about his troubles. He came upon the Washington monument and paused. Looking up he said,' George, what should I do?'

After a few seconds George replied,' Abolish the IRS and start over.'

Bill thought about this for a few seconds and continued jogging. Shortly he came upon the Jefferson Memorial and stopped. He said' Tom, what should I do?'

After a few seconds Tom replied,' Abolish welfare and start over.'

Bill continued jogging after thinking about this and came upon the Lincoln Memorial. He said,' Abe, what should I do?'

After a few seconds Abe replied' Why don't you take the night off and go to the theater?'

Everyday Clinton goes jogging and everyday he passes the same hooker on the same corner and he yells out five bucks, and she says, no way.
so the next day he passes her and yells five bucks and she replies, no way.
Then the next day Hillary decides she wants to go jogging with him, so naturally Bill doesn't yell anything to the hooker but as they pass by the hooker yells out, "see that's what you get for five bucks!!!"

Why won't pigs take up jogging? They don't like to get that far from the table.