Jonny Jokes / Recent Jokes

TEACHER:jonny i want you to say a sentance with the word geomatry in it.
JONNY:a little acorn grew and grew until it woke up and said gee-om-a-tree

Little Jonny Again.
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Little Johnny was 10 years old and like other boys his age, he was rather
curious about everything. He had been hearing quite a bit about' courting'
from the older boys at school, and he wondered what it was, and how it was
done.

One day he took his question to his mother, who became rather flustered.
Instead of explaining things to Johnny, she told him to hide behind the
curtains one night, and watch his older sister and her boyfriend, who she
explained were "courting."

This he did. The following morning, Johnny described everything to his
mother, in great detail.

"Well, Sis and her boyfriend sat and talked for a while, then he turned off
most of the lights. Then he started kissing and hugging her. I figured Sis
must be getting sick, because her face started looking funny. He must have
thought so more...

Once there was a little boy name Jonny Humpharder. There was a little girl that lived down the street, and her mother always told her not to go his Jonny' house or yard. So one day Johnny asks the little girl to come in his yard to play she says, "my mom said I can't." Then he says I'll give you a cookie she says ok. Then he says let go in my house she says my mom says I can't he says I'll give you TWO cookies she says ok. Then he says to her let's go in my room she says my mom said I can't he says I'll give you THREE cookies she says ok. Then Jonny's mom comes home and says, "Jonny Humpharder, Johnny Humpharder," he says "I AM, I AM." The end (I hope you think it was funny because I do)

Little jonnys in class and the teacher says there are 3 magpies sitting on the fence the farmer shoots one how many are left little jonny says there would be none left miss, the teacher says no there would be two left, little jonny says no if the farmer shoots one the other two will fly off, the teacher says no your wrong but i like the way your thinking, little jonny says can i ask you a question miss, ok she says little jonny says three woman walking down the street one is biting a lolly, one is sucking a lolly, one is licking a lolly which one is married.looking a bit flustered the teacher says well i suppose the one sucking a lolly, he says no the one with the wedding ring on her finger but i like the way your thinking...

Just as mom walks though the door, little Jonny comes running over. He says' 'Mommy, Mommy. I was playing in daddy's closet and he came in with the lady next door and they started kissing and then they took off each others clothes and laid down on the bed...'' The mother interupts him.' 'Stop right there!! Wait' till daddy comes home!!'' When the father finally returns from work, mother promptly goes up to him and says' 'I'm leaving you.'' The father, bewildered, slowly asks' 'Why!?! What did I do??'' The mother turns to Jonny and says' ' tell daddy exactly what you told me today!''' 'I was playing in daddy's closet and he came in with the lady next door and they started kissing and then they took each other's clothes off and laid down on the bed... just like what you and Uncle Joe did last summer.''

Jonny the faggot is showering with his boyfriend, Danny, all of a sudden Jonny notices a little cum-looking puddle on the ground and get's furious: "Danny, what did I tell you about farting in the shower?"

jonny was standing on the corner with a bucket half full of chicken shit half full of water. the butcher comes up and says boy what u making, jonny says a butcher.
a preatcher comes up says boy what u making, jonny says a preatcher. the preatcher got mad and went to the cops.
the cop came up and said boy what u making? jonny says chicken shit and water. the cop said "boy u told the butcher u were making a butcher and u told the preatcher that u were making a preatcher. why dident u tell me u were making a cop?
jonny said i havent added the bullshit yet!