Lesson Jokes / Recent Jokes

A Sunday school teacher was giving her class the assignment for the next week. "Next Sunday," she said, "we are going to talk about liars, and in preparation for our lesson I want you all to read the of Mark." The following week, at the beginning of the class meeting, the teacher said, "Now then, all of you who have prepared for the lesson by reading the of Mark, please step to the front of the room." About half the class rose and came forward. "The rest of you may leave," said the teacher, "these students are the ones I want to talk to. There is no in the Book of Mark."

The fourth grade teacher cautiously approched the subject of sex education, knowing little Johnny's propensity for sexual innuendo. Surprisingly, Johnny remained quite attentive throughout her entire lecture.
Towards the end of her lesson, the teacher asked for examples of sex education from the class.
Bobby raised his hand and told the teacher, "Yesterday, I saw a bird in her nest with some eggs." "Very good example," praised the teacher.
Little Mary stood up and said, "My mommy had a baby." "That's wonderful," the teacher said.
Johnny then raised his hand. With much trepidation and fear, the teacher called on him.
"I was watching the Lone Ranger on TV and he was surrounded by tons of Indians. They all attacked him at the same time and he killed all of them with his two guns," Johnny said, proudly.
Relieved, but puzzled, the teacher asked, "What does that have to do with sex education, more...

Joe's chemistry teacher wanted to teach his ninth grade class a lesson on the evils of liquor so he produced a glass of water, a glass of whiskey, and two worms.

"Observe" he told his class as he began to put one of the worms in the glass of water. This worm swam about freely and looked as happy as can be. He then put the second worm in the glass of whiskey and it to swam about for a moment but then started to shake and fell to the bottom dead.

"Now" he asked "What lesson can we learn from this experiment?"

"That's easy," replied Joe. "Drink whiskey and you won't get worms!"

A professor of chemistry wanted to teach his 5th grade class a lesson about the evils of alcohol, so he produced an experiment that involved a glass of water, a glass of whiskey and two worms.
"Now, class. Observe closely the worms," said the professor putting a worm first into the water. The worm in the water writhed about, happy as a worm in water could be.
The second worm, he put into the whiskey. It writhed painfully, and quickly sank to the bottom, dead as a doornail.
"Now, what lesson can we derive from this experiment?" the professor asked.
Little Johnny, who naturally sits in back, raised his hand and wisely, responded...
"Drink whiskey and you won't get worms!"

A professor of chemistry wanted to teach his 5th grade class a lesson about the evils of alcohol, so he produced an experiment that involved a glass of water, a glass of whiskey and two worms."Now, class. Observe closely the worms," said the professor putting a worm first into the water. The worm in the water writhed about, happy as a worm in water could be.The second worm, he put into the whiskey. It writhed painfully, and quickly sank to the bottom, dead as a doornail."Now, what lesson can we derive from this experiment?" the professor asked.Little Johnny, who naturally sits in back, raised his hand and wisely, responded..."Drink whiskey and you won't get worms!"

A professor of chemistry wanted to teach his 5th grade class a lesson about the evils of liquor, so he produced an experiment that involved a glass of water, a glass of whiskey, and two worms.
"Now, class. Observe closely the worms," said the professor putting a worm first into the water. The worm in the water writhed about, happy as a worm in water could be. The second worm, he put into the whiskey. It writhed painfully, and quickly sank to the bottom, dead as a doornail.
"Now, what lesson can we derive from this experiment?" the professor asked.
Johnny, who naturally sits in back, raised his hand and wisely, responded, "Drink whiskey and you won't get worms."

A professor of chemistry wanted to teach his 5th grade class a lesson about the evils of liquor, so he produced an experiment that involved a glass of water, a glass of whiskey, and two worms.
"Now, class. Observe closely the worms," said the professor putting a worm first into the water.
The worm in the water writhed about, happy as a worm in water could be. The second worm, he put into the whiskey. It writhed painfully, and quickly sank to the bottom, dead as a doornail.
"Now, what lesson can we derive from this experiment?" the professor asked.
Johnny, who naturally sits in back, raised his hand and wisely, responded, "Drink whiskey and you won't get worms."