Logic Jokes / Recent Jokes
You are attempting to install Windows XP. Are you sure you want to continue?
Yes.
Are you really sure?
Yes.
Are you really, really sure?
YES!
Ok, then. Just so you know, we're required to ask you that now. It's all your fault for being a picky consumer and supporting that whole "anti-trust" nonsense. Ingrate!
Just get on with it.
Attempting to install Windows XP. First we need to check your system for compatibility. This could take several days.
Groan...
The install program has detected several possible problems and will not let you install XP.
Problems? What problems?
The video card you are using apparently does not work with the motherboard.
But I'm using it at this very moment.
That is irrelevant.
But if the video card isn't working with the motherboard, then I can't very well see this warning message telling me that the video card wasn't...
Do not attempt to fool me with logic, I am a Microsoft product. more...
Microsoft:
YOU ARE ATTEMPTING TO INSTALL WINDOWS XP, ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO CONTINUE?
Yes.
ARE YOU REALLY SURE?
Yes.
ARE YOU REALLY REALLY SURE?
****yes!***
OK, THEN. JUST SO YOU KNOW, WE'RE REQUIRED TO ASK YOU THAT NOW. IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT FOR BEING A PICKY CONSUMER AND SUPPORTING THAT WHOLE "ANTI-TRUST" NONSENSE. INGRATE.
Just get on with it.
ATTEMPTING TO INSTALL WINDOWS XP. FIRST WE NEED TO CHECK YOUR SYSTEM FOR COMPATIBILITY. THIS COULD TAKE SEVERAL DAYS.
Groan.
THE INSTALL PROGRAM HAS DETECTED SEVERAL POSSIBLE PROBLEMS AND WILL NOT LET YOU INSTALL XP.
Problems? What problems?
THE VIDEO CARD YOU ARE USING APPARENTLY DOES NOT WORK WITH THE MOTHERBOARD.
But I'm using it at this very moment.
THAT IS IRRELEVANT.
But if the video card isn't working with the mother board then I can't very well see this warning message telling me that the video card wasn't...
DO NOT ATTEMPT TO FOOL ME WITH LOGIC, I AM A more...
Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities. — Lord Dunsany
When you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?
Does fuzzy logic tickle?
Do blind eskimoes heave seeing-eye sled dogs?
Do they have reserved parking for non-handicap people at the Special Olympics?
Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?
How come wrong numbers are never busy?
Do radioactve cats have 18 half-lives?
If you shoot a mime, should you use a silencer?
Why call it "take" a dump, when you leave something behind?
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
Two rednecks decided that they weren't going anywhere in life and thought they should go to college to get ahead. The first redneck went to see a professor who told him to take math, history, and logic.
"What's logic?" asked the first redneck.
The professor answered, "Let me give you an example. Do you own a Weedeater?"
"I sure do," answered the redneck.
"Then, I can assume, using logic, that you have a yard," replied the professor.
"That's real good," the redneck responded in awe.
The professor continued, "Logic will also tell me that since you have a yard, you also have a house."
Impressed, the redneck shouted, "Amazin!"
"And since you own a house, logic dictates that you have a wife."
"Betty Mae! This is incredible!"
"Finally, since you have a wife, logically I can assume that you more...
A college student was in a philosophy class which had a discussion about God's existence. The professor presented the following logic: "Has anyone in this class heard God?" Nobody spoke. "Has anyone in this class touched God?" Again, nobody spoke. "Has anyone in this class seen God?" When nobody spoke for the third time, he simply stated, "Then there is no God." One student thought for a second, and then asked for permission to reply. Curious to hear this bold student's response, the professor granted it, and the student stood up and asked the following questions of his classmates: "Has anyone in this class heard our professor's brain?" Silence. "Has anyone in this class touched our professor's brain?" Silence. "Has anyone in this class seen our professor's brain?" When nobody in the class dared to speak, the student concluded, "Then, according to our professor' s logic, it must be true that our professor has more...