Paramedic Jokes

Due to a power cut at the time, only one paramedic responded to the call. The house was very, very dark, so the paramedic asked Katelyn, a 3-year-old girl, to hold a flashlight highover her mummy so he could see while he helped deliver the baby. Very diligently, Katelyn did as she was asked.

Heidi pushed and pushed, and after a little while, Connor was born. The paramedic lifted him by his little feet and spanked him on his bottom. Connor began to cry.

The paramedic then thanked Katelyn for her help and asked the wide-eyed 3-year old what she thought about what she had just witnessed.

Katelyn quickly responded, "He shouldn't have crawled in there in the first place. Smack him again."

A paramedic was asked on a local TV talk-show program: "What was your most unusual and challenging 911 call?"

"Recently we got a call from that big white church at 11th and Walnut," the paramedic said. "A frantic usher was very concerned that during the sermon an elderly man passed out in a pew and appeared to be dead. The usher could find no pulse and there was no noticeable breathing."

"What was so unusual and demanding about this particular call?" the interviewer asked.

"Well," the paramedic said, "we carried out four guys before we found the one who was dead."

Should kids witness a birth? A true story:

It was late at night and Heidi, who was expecting her second child was home alone with her 3-year old daughter Katelyn. When Heidi started going into labor, she called "911."

Due to a power outage at the time, only one paramedic responded to the call. The house was very, very dark, so the paramedic asked Katelyn to hold a flashlight high over her mommy so he could see while he helped deliver the baby. Very diligently, Katelyn did as she was asked.

Heidi pushed and pushed, and after a little while Connor was born. The paramedic lifted him by his little feet and spanked him on his bottom. Connor began to cry.

The paramedic then thanked Katelyn for her help and asked the wide-eyed 3-year old what she thought about what she had just witnessed.

Katelyn quickly responded, "He shouldn't have crawled in there in the first place. Smack him again!"

Three paramedics were boasting about improvements in their respective ambulance team’s response times. “Since we installed our new satellite navigation system, ” bragged one, “we’ve cut our emergency response time by ten percent. ”“Not bad, ” the second paramedic commented. “But by using a computer model of traffic patterns, we we cut our average time by 20 percent. ”“That’s nothing said the third paramedic. “Since our ambulance driver passed the bar exam, we’ve cut our emergency response time in half! ”

Should children witness childbirth?
Due to a power-outage at the time, only one paramedic responded to the call.The house was very, very dark, so the paramedic asked Katelyn, a 3-year old girl, to hold a flashlight high over her Mommy so he could see while he
helped deliver the baby.
Very diligently, Katelyn did as she was asked.Heidi pushed and pushed, and after a little while Connor was born. The paramedic lifted him by his
little feet and spanked him on his bottom. Connor began to cry.
The paramedic then thanked Katelyn for her help and asked the wide-eyed 3-year old what she thought about what she had just witnessed.
Katelyn quickly responded, "He shouldn't have crawled in there in the first place. Smack him again."