Parton Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Subject: Additional Training

    It is now and always has been the policy of this Company to assure its
    employees that they are well trained. Through our Special High Intensity
    Training program (SHIT), we have given our employees more SHIT than any
    other company in the area.

    If any employee feels that he or she could advance to another position by
    taking more SHIT, see your supervisor.

    Our management people are specially trained to assure that you will get all
    the SHIT you can handle.

    Any individual who feels he or she has not received sufficient Special High
    Intensity Training, tell your supervisor, she he can put you at the top of
    the SHIT list.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    What do you call a truck load of vibrators?
    - Toys for twats.

    What is red and has seven dents?
    - Snow White's cherry

    How can you tell Dolly Parton's more...

    If Yoko Ono married Sonny Bono, she'd be Yoko Ono Bono.
    If Dolly Parton married Salvador Dali, she'd be Dolly Dali.
    If Bo Derek married Don Ho, she'd be Bo Ho.
    If Oprah Winfrey married Depak Chopra, she'd be Oprah Chopra.
    If Cat Stevens married Snoop Doggy Dogg, hey! it's the '90's!, he'd be Cat Doggy Dogg.
    If Olivia Newton-John married Wayne Newton, then divorced him to marry Elto John, she'd be Olivia Newton-John Newton John.
    If Sondra Locke married Elliott Ness, then divorced him to marry Herman Munster, she'd become Sondra Locke Ness Munster.
    If Bea Arthur married Sting, she'd be Bea Sting.
    If Liv Ullman married Judge Lance Ito, then divorced him and married Jerry Mathers, she'd be Liv Ito Beaver.
    If Snoop Doggy Dogg married Winnie the Pooh, he'd be Snoop Doggy Dogg Pooh.
    How about a baseball marriage? If Boog Powell married Felipe Alou, he'd be Boog Alou.
    If G. Gordon Liddy married Boutros-Boutros Ghali, then divorced him to marry Kenny more...

    Knock Knock
    Who's there!
    Parton!
    Parton who?
    Parton my French!

    If Yoko Ono married Sonny Bono, she'd be Yoko Ono Bono.If Dolly Parton married Salvador Dali, she'd be Dolly Dali.If Bo Derek married Don Ho, she'd be Bo Ho.If Oprah Winfrey married Depak Chopra, she'd be Oprah Chopra.If Cat Stevens married Snoop Doggy Dogg, hey! it's the '90's!, he'd beCat Doggy Dogg.If Olivia Newton-John married Wayne Newton, then divorced him to marry Elton John, she'd be Olivia Newton-John Newton John.If Sondra Locke married Elliott Ness, then divorced him to marry Herman Munster, she'd become Sondra Locke Ness Munster.If Bea Arthur married Sting, she'd be Bea Sting.If Liv Ullman married Judge Lance Ito, then divorced him and married Jerry Mathers, she'd be Liv Ito Beaver.If Snoop Doggy Dogg married Winnie the Pooh, he'd be Snoop Doggy DoggPooh.How about a baseball marriage? If Boog Powell married Felipe Alou, he'd be Boog Alou.If G. Gordon Liddy married Boutros-Boutros Ghali, then divorced him tomarry Kenny G., he'd be G. Ghali G.Nog (Quark's brother on more...

    Knock Knock
    Who's there?
    Parton!
    Parton who?
    Parton my French!

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