Penguin Jokes / Recent Jokes

Q: Why do two Penguins in a nest always agree?

A. Because they don?t wanna fall out.

Q: What?s black and white and goes round and around?

A. A Penguin in a revolving door.

A Mexican newspaper reports that bored Royal Air Force pilots stationedon the Falkland Islands have devised what they consider a marvelous newgame. Noting that the local penguins are fascinated by airplanes, thepilots search out a beach where the birds are gathered and fly slowly
along it at the water edge. Perhaps ten thousand penguins turn theirheads in unison watching the planes go by, and when the pilots turnaround and fly back, the birds turn their heads in the opposite direction, like spectators at a slow-motion tennis match. Then, the paper reports, "The pilots fly out to sea and directly to the penguin
colony and overfly it. Heads go up, up, up, and ten thousand penguinsfall over gently onto their backs.

A Mexican newspaper reports that bored Royal Air Force pilots stationedon the Falkland Islands have devised what they consider a marvelous newgame. Noting that the local penguins are fascinated by airplanes, thepilots search out a beach where the birds are gathered and fly slowlyalong it at the water edge. Perhaps ten thousand penguins turn theirheads in unison watching the planes go by, and when the pilots turnaround and fly back, the birds turn their heads in the opposite direction, like spectators at a slow-motion tennis match. Then, the paper reports, "The pilots fly out to sea and directly to the penguincolony and overfly it. Heads go up, up, up, and ten thousand penguinsfall over gently onto their backs.

A guy is walking down the street, and he's really horny. So he goes to the
first whore house he sees. He only has five dollars, so they kick him out.
The guy goes to the next one. But, since he only has five dollars, he
gets kicked out.
So by this time, he's really super horny, so he goes to the next one and
says, "Look, I only have five dollars. I'm really horny, and I need a
blow-job for 5 dollars!"
The guy there says "OK. For five dollars, we can give you a penguin."

"What's a penguin?"
"You'll see." So, the guy takes the $5 and leads the horny man to a
bedroom. The horny man unzips his pants, and waits for his "penguin."
Soon, a whore comes in and starts giving the guy a blow job. Just as he's
about to let loose, she stops and walks away. Now, the horny guy with his
pants at his ankles, waddles after her, shouting...
"HEY! WHAT'S A PENGUIN?!"

Q: Why don´t you see Penguins in Britain? A: Because they´re afraid of Wales.

Q: What kind of fish do Penguins catch at night? A: Starfish.