Penguins Jokes / Recent Jokes

When a man stopped at a gas station for a fill-up, the attendant noticed two penguins sitting in the back seat of the car.
"What's with the penguins in the back seat?" he asked the driver.
"Oh, I found them," the driver replied, "but I haven't a clue what to do with them."
The attendant thought about it for a moment and replied, "Perhaps you should take them to the zoo."
"That's a great idea," the man said as he drove away.
The next day, the same man returned to the same gas station and the attendant noticed the penguins were still in the car.
"I thought you were going to take them to the zoo," he said.
"I did," the driver replied. "We had such a great time so today I'm taking them to the beach."

Early one morning a stranger pulled up to the gas station in his convertible, and on the back seat were standing three penguins.

The cashier saw the peguins in the car, and when the man came in to pay she asked him what he was doing with the three penguins.

"I don't know what to do with them," said the man. "I've just been driving around with them in the back seat all week."

"Why don't you take them to the zoo?" said the cashier.

"Why, that's a great idea! I'll take them there right away!

A few days later, the same man pulls up in his convertible, and he still has those three penguins standing on his back seat!

"I thought you were going to take those penguins to the zoo," said the cashier.

"Oh, I did, and we had a great time. Today, we're going to the beach!"

A man pulls up to a gas station on a very hot day and the young attendant just happened to glance in the backseat, where he sees two penguins. He says, "Sir, it is so hot outside. Those two penguins belong at the zoo!"Yes, you are right," the man said. "Thank you."The next day, the guy comes to buy more gas and the penguins are standing up on the back seat wearing sunglasses. The young guy says, "Man, you said that you were taking them to the zoo."Well, yes, I took them and they liked it so much that today we are going to the beach."
Saved $2 "A man ran into his house puffing. His wife asked, "what happened?"
The man replied,"I saved $2".His wife answered,"How did you do that?" He answered,"I chased a bus home". The wife then said,"You could of saved $10 by chasing a taxi home".

A police officer sees a man driving around with a pickup truck full of penguins. He pulls the guy over and says: "You can't drive around with penguins in this town! Take them to the zoo immediately."

The guy says OK, and drives away. The next day, the officer sees the guy still driving around with the truck full of penguins - and they're all wearing sunglasses.

He pulls the guy over and demands: "I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo yesterday?" The guy replies: "I did, today I'm taking them to the beach."

Kimo is a bus driver for the Honolulu Transit Company. One day Kimo is headed to work on his bus route, when he runs across a delivery van stranded at the side of the road. The van driver works for the Honolulu Zoo. He pleads with Kimo to do him a favor.

He offers a $100 bill to Kimo to help him deliver a truckload of penguins to the zoo, because they needed to be there within the hour. Agreeing, Kimo proceeds to load two dozen penguins onto his bus. Then, off they drive towards the zoo.

An hour later, the delivery driver gets his van fixed and heads off to the zoo to catch up with his delivery. As he's driving down the road, he see's Kimo and the busload of penguins heading in the opposite direction. He turns his van around and chases in pursuit. He finally catches up to the bus and pulls over Kimo on the side of the road.

In an irate voice he asks, "Hey, Kimo. I thought I gave you a $100 dollars to go and take the penguins to the zoo for more...

why do penguins get confused with the bridesmade groom?
because they both have tuxedos

One day, Officer Bill is on duty, driving around in his cruiser, when he catches sight of a station wagon that appears to have about two dozen children in the back, all jumping up and down, and waving their arms.
Wondering what is going on, he pulls the guy over, and asks: "What are all those kids doing in the back?"
"Oh, they're not children, Officer," replies the driver, "They're some penguins I found the other day. I don't know what to do with then so they have been living with me for the last few days."
Officer Bill is a bit surprised, but manages to come back with: "You can't drive around with penguins in the back of your station wagon! I want you to take them to the zoo immediately."
So the guy turns around, and drives off towards the zoo.
Next day, Officer Bill is cruising again, and sees the same station wagon, and as he pulls up closer, he sees that the penguins are still in the back. So he pulls the driver over more...