Persuasion Jokes

A politician is a person who can make waves and then make you think they are the only one who can save the ship.

Best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low
stress, non-addictive, gender neutral, winter solstice holiday, practiced
within the most joyous traditions of the religious persuasion
of your choice, but with respect for the religious persuasion of others who
choose to practice their own religion as well as those who choose not to
practice a religion at all; plus, A fiscally successful, personally
fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the generally
accepted calendar year 1999, but not without due respect for
the calendars of choice of the other cultures whose contributions have
helped make our society great, without regards to the race, creed, color,
religious, or sexual preferences of the wishes.
(disclaimer: This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal.
It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes
for him/herself or others and no more...

"Best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral winter solstice holiday, practiced with the most joyous traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice but with no implication that you have a religious persuasion, and with respect for the religious persuasions of others or their choice not to practice a religion at all."
Adding all my wishes for the same to you and yours, Jeff. Note: the preceding was forwarded from' The Globe and Mail', quoting Gerry Furney, the mayor of Port McNeill, British Columbia, Canada this morning.

Best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral, winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most joyous traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, but with respect for the religious persuasion of others who choose to practice their own religion as well as those who choose not to practice a religion at all;
Additionally,
a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the generally accepted calendar year 2000, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions have helped make our society great, without regard to the race, creed, color, religious, or sexual preferences of the wishes.
(Disclaimer: This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her/himself or others and no responsibility for any unintended emotional stress more...

Best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially
responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral, winter
solstice holiday, practiced within the most joyous traditions of
the religious persuasion of your choice, but with respect for
the religious persuasion of others who choose to practice their
own religion as well as those who choose not to practice a
religion at all; plus... A fiscally successful, personally
fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the
generally accepted calendar year 2000, but not without due respect
for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions
have helped make our society great, without regard to the race,
creed color, religious, or sexual preferences of the wishes.

Disclaimer: This greeting is subject to clarification or with-
drawal. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement
any of the wishes for her/himself or others and no more...