Putt Jokes / Recent Jokes

A Nun and her friend, Sarah were playing golf. Sarah misses a 3 foot putt and yells, "Goddamn it, missed the bugger!" and the nun says, "If you keep saying that then God will punish you." Next hole Sarah misses a 2 foot putt and says "Goddamn it, missed the bugger!" and the nun says, "ONE more time Sarah, and God will punish you!" Then Sarah misses a neoot putt and says "GOD DAMN IT!!!MISSED THE BUGGER!" Suddenly clouds form overhead. God comes down from Heaven and strikes the nun dead with a bolt of thunder. God says, "Goddamn it! Missed the bugger!"

A man and his friend meet at the clubhouse and decide to play a round of golf. The man has a little dog with him, and on the first green, when he sinks a 20-foot putt, the little dog starts to yip, stands up on its hind legs and walks around in circles.
Amazed, the friend says, "Wow, that dog is really talented! What does he do if you miss a putt?

An older couple are playing in the annual golf club championship. They are playing in a play off hole and it is down to a 6 inch putt that the wife has to make. She takes her stance and her husband can see her trembling. She putts and misses; they lose the match. On the way home in the car her husband is fuming, "I can't believe you missed that putt! That putt was no longer than my 'willy'." The wife just looked over at her husband and smiled and said, "Yes dear, but it was much harder!"

A man and a vicar were playing golf one day, and the man was not having a good game.
"Oh, darn, I've missed!" he said at the first green, missing an easy putt. "Oh, darn, I've missed again!" he said at the second green as he missed another easy putt.
And so it went on - every time he played a bad shot, he would say "Oh, darn, I've missed!"
The vicar put up with this for half the round, but then felt he owed it to the dignity of his calling to remonstrate with the man.
"You really must not keep using such dreadful language," said the vicar "or the lord may well strike you down!"
Just as the words were out of his mouth, there came a jagged flash of lightning - and in a split-second, the vicar was burnt to a crisp! Above the rolling thunder-clouds, a deep voice said "Oh, darn, I've missed...!"