Screw Jokes / Recent Jokes
Q: How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
Q: How many soccer players does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Five. One to get into position to screw it in, one to kick the legs out from under him, one to snatch the lightbulb and pass it to his mate who, then goes and screws it in over the other side of the room, and one to roll around on the floor pretending to be really injured.
Q: How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him.
How does a man take a bubble bath? He eats beans for dinner.Why do women rub their eyes when they wake up? Because they don't have testicles.Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Breasts don't have eyes.Why don't men eat more M&M's? They're too hard to peel.What do you call a man with an IQ of 50? Gifted.What's a man's idea of foreplay? A half hour of begging.How can you tell if a man is sexually excited? He's breathing.What do men and bottles of beer have in common? They're both empty from the neck up.How can you tell if a man is happy? Who cares!!! What is the thinnest book in the world? What Men Know About WomenHow many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Men will screw anything! How do you save a man from drowning? Take your foot off his head.How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? We don't know - it's never happened.Why do men always have a stupid look on their faces? Because they're stupid.How are men and parking spots alike? The good more...
Q: How many (generation) Xers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two, one to go and shoplift the bulb so the boomers have something to screw in and the other to screw it in for minimum wage.
Q: How many Michael Jacksons does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. Michael Jackson only screws little boys!
Dinosaur #1: "How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?" Dinosaur #2: "What is an economist?" Dinosaur #1: "A flunkie mathematician who tries to predict the population of kangaroos in Australia. But that's not important and don't ask what a Kangaroo is." Dinosaur #2: "I don't know, how many?" Dinosaur #1: "10 economists and one grad student. One economist to make a model, one to run the regression, one to test the hypothesis, one to interpret the results, one to conclude how to screw it on, one grad student to screw it on, and five economists trying to fight off the dinosaurs trying to eat them.