Sony Jokes / Recent Jokes

If Sony made toasters... Their Sony Toastman, which would be barely larger thanthe single piece of bread it is meant to toast, can beconveniently attached to your belt.

Imagine if major companies from all around the world started producing or sponsoring condoms. They would become fashionable and companies would probably advertise more openly.
Imagine the trademarks:
Nike Condoms: - Just do It
Toyota Condoms: - Oh what a feeling
Ford Condoms: - The ride of your life
Sony Condoms: - Do not underestimate the power of Sony
Microsoft Condoms: - Where do you want to go today?
KFC Condoms: - Finger Licking Good
M&Ms Condoms: - Melt in your mouth, not in your hands
Coca-Cola Condom: - The Real Thing
Ever-Ready Condoms: - Keep going and going
Macintosh Condoms: - It does more, it costs less, it's that simple
Pringles Condoms: - Once you pop, you can't stop

If Sony made toasters...Their Sony Toastman, which would be barely larger thanthe single piece of bread it is meant to toast, can beconveniently attached to your belt.

Sony, the global electronics giant, has some good news for couch potatoes. It has developed a new' remote control for your remote control', that enables the truly lazy to surf channels while moving even less muscles than before. "Our new device totally eliminates the need to stretch your arm that little bit more from your couch, to get the remote directly in front of the TV. Now the only muscle you need to move is your finger.", said a company spokesman. He also added that this was just one more step in Sony's global initiative to keep inventing technologies that turn people into furniture, and their brains into Jell-O. "We wanted to refine the product even more by making it thought-controlled, thereby completely removing the need for any sort of muscle movement at all, but this wouldn't work because most TV addicts are completely incapable of any kind of thought at all", lamented a little Japanese scientist.

If IBM made toasters...
They would want one big toaster where people bring bread to be submitted
for overnight toasting. IBM would claim a worldwide market for five,
maybe six toasters.
If Microsoft made toasters...
Every time you bought a loaf of bread, you would have to buy a toaster.
You wouldn't have to take the toaster, but you'd still have to pay for
it anyway. Toaster'95 would weigh 15000 pounds (hence requiring a
reinforced steel countertop), draw enough electricity to power a small
city, take up 95% of the space in your kitchen, would claim to be the
first toaster that lets you control how light or dark you want your
toast to be, and would secretly interrogate your other appliances to
find out who made them. Everyone would hate Microsoft toasters, but
nonetheless would buy them since most of the good bread only works with
their toasters.
If Apple made toasters...
It would do everything the Microsoft toaster does, more...