Summit Jokes

While visiting the United States, the Pope met with President Clinton. Rather than just an hour as scheduled, the meeting lasted for two days. Finally, a weary President Clinton emerged to meet with the media.
Smiling, he announced that the summit was a great success. He said he and the Pope agreed on 80% of the matters they discussed and that he was now going home to the White House to be with his family.
The Pope then came out to make his statement. He appeared tired, very discouraged and close to tears. Sadly, he announced his meeting with the President was a failure. Confused, one reported asked, "But, your Holiness, the President just announced the summit was quite a success and the two of you agreed on 80% of the items discussed."
Frustrated, the Pope replied, "Yes, but we were discussing the Ten Commandments!"

At the Healthcare summit, a heated debate between President Obama and John McCain resulted with President Obama telling John McCain that the 2008 presidential elections has been over. John McCain replied that he was reminded of that everyday. Then McCain turns to Sarah Palin and asked; "Did we win that election?"

Guarded transcripts of the White House "Beer Summit" were leaked this morning.
Reports indicate that after three beers, President Obama, Professor Gates and Sergeant Crowley found common ground by sharing Jewish jokes.

During his visit to the United States the Pope met with President Clinton. Instead of just an hour as scheduled, the meeting went on for two days. Finally, a weary President Clinton emerged to face the waiting news media.

The President was smiling and announced the summit was a resounding success. He said he and the Pope agreed on 80% of the matters they discussed. Then Mr. Clinton declared he was going home to the White House to be with his family.

A few minutes later the Pope came out to make his statement. He looked tired, discouraged and was practically in tears. Sadly he announced his meeting with the President was a failure.

Incredulous, one reporter asked, "But your Holiness, President Clinton just announced the summit was a great success and the two of you agreed on 80% of the items discussed".

Exasperated, the Pope answered, "Yes, but we were talking about the Ten Commandments."

Scenario: International Summit in Paris.
Boris Yeltsin, Bill Clinton & Ernesto Zedillo (Mexican President).
The waiter ask "le apperitive?"
All of them answer "oui!"
The waiter looks at Zedillo "Le tequila?"
Zedillo: "oui!"
The waiter looks at Yeltsin "Le vodka?"
Yeltsin: "oui!"
Finally the waiter looks at Clinton "Le whisky?"
Clinton: "DON'T MENTION THAT BITCH"