Taxidermist Jokes / Recent Jokes

There was once an aspiring veterinarian who put himself through veterinary school working nights as a taxidermist.
Upon graduation, he decided he could combine his two vocations to better serve the needs of his patients and their owners, while doubling his practice and, therefore, his income.
He opened his own offices with a shingle on the door saying,
"Dr. Jones, Veterinary Medicine and Taxidermy -
Either way, you get your dog back!"

A taxidermist
is on vacation down south. He is feeling
a little thirsty and decides
to have a few drinks at the
nearest tavern. Upon entering the tavern,
the conversation
stops and all eyes turn to him.
Feeling a little uneasy,
he makes his way to the bar to
order a beer. The bartender serves him
and says, "Ya'll
ain't from 'round these parts, is ya?"
Guy: "No...I
am from Connecticut."
Bartender: "What is it you do up there in Connecticut?"
Guy: "Well, I am a taxidermist."
Bartender: "A taxidermist...Hey Al, you ever hear of a taxi-
dermist?"
Al: "No, never heard of it."
Bartender: "So Mr. Taxidermist, what is it you do exactly?"
Guy: "Well, I mount dead animals."
Bartender: "It's OK boys-he's one of us!".

What's the difference between a taxidermist and a tax collector?
The taxidermist only takes the skin.

This guy walks into a bar in Alabama and orders a white wine. Everybody
sitting around the bar looks up, surprised, and the bartender looks around and
says: "You ain't from around here, are ya... where ya from, boy?"
The guy says, "I'm from Iowa."
The bartender asks, "What th' hell you do in Iowa?"
The guy responds, "I'm a taxidermist."
The bartender asks, "A taxidermist... now just what th' hell is a
taxidermist?"
The guy says "I mount animals."
The bartender grins and shouts out to the whole bar, "It's OK boys, he's one
of us!"

You owe the taxidermist more than your annual income.

A guy walks into a bar in Oklahoma and orders a white wine. Everybody sitting around the bar looks up, surprised, and the bartender looks around and says, "You ain't from around here, are ya? Where ya from, boy?"
The guy says, "I'm from Iowa."
The bartender asks, "What the heck you do in Iowa?"
The guy responds, "I'm a taxidermist."
The bartender asks, "A taxidermist? Now just what the heck is a taxidermist?"
The guy says nervously, "I mount animals."
The bartender grins and shouts out to the whole bar, "It's okay boys, he's one of us!"

A guy walks into a bar in Oklahoma and orders a white wine. Everybody sitting around the bar looks up, surprised, and the bartender looks around and says, "You ain't from around here, are ya? Where ya from, boy?"
The guy says, "I'm from Iowa."
The bartender asks, "What the heck you do in Iowa?"
The guy responds, "I'm a taxidermist."
The bartender asks, "A taxidermist? Now just what the heck is a taxidermist?"
The guy says nervously, "I mount animals."
The bartender grins and shouts out to the whole bar, "It's okay boys, he's one of us!"