Thump Jokes

What do you get when you have a cow and a duck?
Milk and quackers.
What does an envelope say when you lick it?
Nothing, it just shuts up.
What does Michael Jackson call his "Tickle-me Elmo" doll?
Bait.
What goes "99 thump 99 thump 99 thump...?"
A centipede with a wooden leg.
What goes "Tick tock, woof woof"?
A watch dog.
What is a reptile's favorite movie?
The Lizard of Oz.
What is Beethoven doing in his coffin right now?
Decomposing.
What kind of reptile tells time?
A clock-odile.
What kind of snack do little monkeys have with their milk?
Chocolate chimp cookies.
What magazine do cats like to read?
Good Mousekeeping.
What's happening when you hear "woof...splat...meow...splat?"
It's raining cats and dogs.

What do you get when you have a cow and a duck? Milk and quackers.
What does an envelope say when you lick it? Nothing, it just shuts up.
What does Michael Jackson call his "Tickle-me Elmo" doll? Bait.
What goes "99 thump 99 thump 99 thump...?" A centipede with a wooden leg.
What goes "Tick tock, woof woof"? A watch dog.
What is a reptile's favorite movie? The Lizard of Oz.
What is Beethoven doing in his coffin right now? Decomposing.
What kind of reptile tells time? A clock-odile.
What kind of snack do little monkeys have with their milk? Chocolate chimp cookies.
What magazine do cats like to read? Good Mousekeeping.
What's happening when you hear "woof...splat...meow...splat?" It's raining cats and dogs.

What do you get when you have a cow and a duck? Milk and quackers.What does an envelope say when you lick it? Nothing, it just shuts up.What does Michael Jackson call his "Tickle-me Elmo" doll? Bait.What goes "99 thump 99 thump 99 thump...?"A centipede with a wooden leg.What goes "Tick tock, woof woof"? A watch dog.What is a reptile's favorite movie? The Lizard of Oz.What is Beethoven doing in his coffin right now? Decomposing.What kind of reptile tells time? A clock-odile.What kind of snack do little monkeys have with their milk? Chocolate chimp cookies.What magazine do cats like to read? Good Mousekeeping.What's happening when you hear "woof...splat...meow...splat?" It's raining cats and dogs.

What do you get when you have a cow and a duck? Milk and quackers. What does an envelope say when you lick it? Nothing, it just shuts up. What does Michael Jackson call his "Tickle-me Elmo" doll? Bait. What goes "99 thump 99 thump 99 thump...?" A centipede with a wooden leg. What goes "Tick tock, woof woof"? A watch dog. What is a reptile's favorite movie? The Lizard of Oz. What is Beethoven doing in his coffin right now? Decomposing. What kind of reptile tells time? A clock-odile. What kind of snack do little monkeys have with their milk? Chocolate chimp cookies. What magazine do cats like to read? Good Mousekeeping. What's happening when you hear "woof... splat... meow... splat?" It's raining cats and dogs.

This blonde, brunette and a redhead are escaping from jail. The redhead jumps over the wall and lands with a THUMP. The guard yells "Who's out there?" The redhead says'meow""Oh it's just a cat" The brunette jumps over the wall and lands with a THUMP. The guard yells'who's out there? The brunette says'meow." "Oh it's just that darn cat, get lost you stupid thing." Then the blonde jumps over and lands with a THUMP."Who's out there?" "The blonde yells "It's just that darn cat".