Tiger Jokes / Recent Jokes
As Tiger is enjoying a piece of'humble pie" in his back yard, a group of ladies mistakenly hit their drive into Tiger's back yard. As Tiger goes to retrieve the ball to return to the ladies the lady tosses another ball over the fence. Tiger says "Hey what is that for". The lady ...replies "Every Pr#ck needs two balls".
Anyone notice that all of the bimbos that helped bring down the Tiger are listed as "Club Ho(stesse)s"?
Strange for a guy renowned for his astute club selection.
A couple was on their honeymoon, lying in bed, about ready to consummate their marriage, when the new bride says to the husband, "I have a confession to make, I'm not a virgin."
The husband replies, "That's no big thing in this day and age."
The wife continues, "Yeah, I've been with one guy."
"Oh yeah? Who was the guy?"
"Tiger Woods."
"Tiger Woods, the golfer?"
"Yeah."
"Well, he's rich, famous and handsome. I can see why you went to bed with him."
The husband and wife then make passionate love.
When they are done, the husband gets up and walks to the telephone.
"What are you doing?" asks the wife.
The husband says, "I'm hungry, I was going to call room service and get something to eat."
"Tiger wouldn't do that."
"Oh yeah? What would Tiger do?"
"He'd come back to bed and do it a second time."
The more...
Q: What looks like half a cat? A: The other half! Q: What was the name of the film about a killer lion that swam underwater? A:' Claws.' Q: If a four-legged animal is a quadruped and a two-legged animal is a biped, What's a tiger? A: A stri-ped! Q: What do you get if you cross a tiger with a sheep? A: A stripey sweater! Q: How does a lion greet the other animals in the field? A:' Pleased to eat you.'! Q: What do you get if you cross a tiger with a snowman? A: Frostbite! Q: What did the lions say to his cubs when he taught them to hunt? A:' Don't go over the road till you see the zebra crossing.' Q: What is lion's favorite food? A: Baked beings!
Tiger's recent transgressions remind us golfers that somedays course conditions suggest that its best to keep the wood in the bag.
Two tigers were stalking through the jungles of Asia. Suddenly, the one to the rear reached out with his tongue, and licked the posterior of the tiger in front of him. The startled front tiger turned and said, "Cut it out." The rear tiger apologized, and they continued onward.
About five minutes later, it happened again. The front tiger turned, growling, "I said stop it." The rear tiger again apologized, and they continued.
Another five minutes passed, and again the front tiger felt the unwanted tongue. The front tiger turned, giving the rear tiger a ferocious glare, angrily hissing, "What is it with you?"
The rear tiger replied, "I'm sorry -- I really didn't mean to offend you. But I just ate a lawyer and I'm trying to get the taste out of my mouth!"