Titanic Jokes / Recent Jokes
Q. What is the mating call of the ugly blonde?
A. (Screaming) "I said. I'm drunk!"
Q. Why do blondes wear green lipstick?
A. Because red means stop.
Q. Why do blondes wear hoop earrings?
A. They have to have some place to rest their ankles.
Q. Why do blondes where big hoop earrings?
A. To put their feet through.
Q. What's a brunette's mating call?
A. Has that blonde gone yet?
A2. When is that blonde bitch going to leave!?
A3. "All the blondes have gone home!"
Q. What do you say to a blonde that won't give in?
A. "Have another beer."
Q. Why is a blonde like a door knob?
A. Because everybody gets a turn.
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a Porsche?
A. You don't lend the Porsche out to your friend.
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a toothbrush?
A. You don't let your best friend borrow your toothbrush.
Q. What is the difference between more...
Q: What is the difference between Clinton and the Titanic?
A: Only 200 women went down on the Titanic.
Definition: A manager is a person who thinks that nine women can produce a child in one month.
Robots: Our Steel Collar Workers.
Q: What’s the difference between Xerox and the Titanic?
A: The Titanic had a band.
Q: What does Santa call his wife at tax time?
A: A dependent Claus.
Q: What do you call a credit union volunteer in a room full of bank directors?
A: A superior being.
Q: What is the difference between big foot and a socially responsible banker?
A: Big foot has been sighted.
Q: Why did the bank drive-up window teller have tire tread marks across the back of his grey suit?
A: From crawling across the street when the sign said: “Don’t Walk. ”
Q: How do you confuse a bank teller?
A: Give him a bag of M&M’s and tell him to alphabetize them.
Q: Why is a BMW a banker’s favorite car?
A: Because he can’t spell Porsche.
Anti-trust laws should be approached with exactly that attitude
If more...
A teacher, a thief and a lawyer all die in the same freak accident. So when they reach the pearly gates, St. Peter tells them that, unfortunately, heaven is overcrowded, so they each have to answer a question correctly for admission.
The teacher is first, and St. Peter asks, "Name the famous ship that was sunk by an iceberg?"
"Phew, that one's easy," says the teacher, "The Titanic."
"Alright," said St.Peter, "you may pass."
Then the thief got his question: "How many died on the Titanic?"
The thief replied, "That's a toughy, but fortunately I just saw the movie. The answer is 1500 people." And so he passed through.
Last, St. Peter gave the lawyer his question: "Name them
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and the Titanic?
A. They know how many went down on the Titanic.
Definition: A manager is a person who thinks that nine women can produce a child in one month. Robots: Our Steel Collar Workers. Q: What's the difference between Xerox and the Titanic? A: The Titanic had a band. Q: What does Santa call his wife at tax time? A: A dependent Claus. Q: What do you call a credit union volunteer in a room full of bank directors? A: A superior being. Q: What is the difference between big foot and a socially responsible banker? A: Big foot has been sighted. Q: Why did the bank drive-up window teller have tire tread marks across the back of his grey suit? A: From crawling across the street when the sign said: "Don't Walk." Q: How do you confuse a bank teller? A: Give him a bag of M&M's and tell him to alphabetize them. Q: Why is a BMW a banker's favorite car? A: Because he can't spell Porsche. Anti-trust laws should be approached with exactly that attitude