Tomatos Jokes

there is a 3 tomatos walking down the street, a daddy tomato a mommy tomato and a baby tomato, the baby tomato starts to trail behind...so the father turns around goes back to the baby and steps on him...and says..."ketchup"

Fried Green Tomatos Joke Once there was a beautiful woman who loved to work in her vegtable garden, but no matter what she did, she couldn't get her tomatoes to ripen. Admiring her neighbor's garden, which had beautiful, bright red tomatoes, she went one day and inquired of him his secret.
"It's really quite simple," the old man explained. "Twice each day, in the morning and in the evening, I expose myself in front of the tomatoes and they turn red with embarrassment."
Desperate for the perfect garden, she tried his advice and proceeded to expose herself to her plants, twice daily. Two weeks passed and her neighbor stopped by to check her progress.
"So," he asked, "Any luck with your tomatoes?"
"No," she replied excitedly... "But you should see the size of my cucumbers!"

A woman's garden is growing beautifully but the darn tomatos won't ripen.
There's a limit to the number of uses for green tomatos and she's getting
tired of it.
So she goes to her neighbor and says, ''Your tomatos are ripe, mine are green.
What can I do about it?''
Her neighbor replies, ''Well, it may sound absurd but here's what to do.
Tonight there's no moon. After dark go out into your garden and take all your
clothes off. Tomatos can see in the dark and they'll be embarrassed and
blush. In the morning they'll all be red, you'll see.''
Well, what the heck? She does it.
Next day her neighbor asks how it worked.
''So-so,'' she answers. ''The tomatos are still green but the cucumbers are
all four inches longer.''
Guide for all women "A WOMAN'S GUIDE TO WHAT A MAN IS REALLY SAYING: I'M HUNGRY.I'm hungry. I'M SLEEPY.I'm sleepy. I'M TIRED.I'm tired. I'VE GOTTA GO.Get out of the way and stay away until it clears. WHAT'S WRONG? I more...