Tornado Jokes / Recent Jokes

A tornado walks into a bar and orders a Hurricane. The bartender asks why he is ordering a Hurricane when he is a tornado. The tornado responds with, "I am a hurricane induced tornado".

Q: What do a tornado and a redneck divorce have in common?
A: In the end, someone's gonna lose a trailer.

A tornado goes through your trailer's yard and makes it look neater.
You've got to shuck your toilet paper before you use it.
You have an autographed picture of Bob Barker in your wallet.

Q. What does a tornado and a wife have in common?
A. They make a lot of noise when they are cuming and take the house with em when they go.

How are women and a tornado alike?
They both moan like hell when they come, and take the house when they leave.

An ad on the subway in NYC: "Learn to read and speak English. Call us now."
An Amelia Island, FL, podiatrist: "Emergency Foot Surgery- Walk-ins Welcomed."
Sign over a restroom in a restaurant: "Used beer department."
On a store front in Florida: "Your one stop shop! Beer ammo and liquor. Drive through open 24 hours!"
A speed limit sign on Long Beach Island, New Jersey: "Smile, You're on Radar!"
Seen in a State Park in California: "Weather Station (A large sign with a Rock hanging on a rope) Check the Rock. If it's wet, it's raining. If it's moving, it's windy. If you can't see it, it's foggy. If rock is gone, it's a tornado."
An ad on the subway in NYC: "Learn to read and speak English. Call us now."
An Amelia Island, FL, podiatrist: "Emergency Foot Surgery- Walk-ins Welcomed."
Sign over a restroom in a restaurant: "Used beer department."
On a store more...

Thought I'd pass along a grant proposal for important research. The following letter was received by the head meteorologist at the Miami, FL weather service office.
Dear Sir:
Last night, my 7 year-old son saw the movie Twister. He has abandoned his dreams of being a train engineer and wants to be a meteorologist. Needless to say he was determined to make an even better tornado studying machine. He wanted to empty his bank account to get a tornado sniffing dog.
I told him that the U.S. Government funded scientific research, and suggested he write for a grant. I thought you may enjoy his efforts, and I know that we would appreciate some kind of reply to his Grant Request.
Thank you for your time.
Dear Sirs:
I want to make an experiment to study tornadoes from the inside. I need a lot of money, so I am asking you for a Grant.
I will need these things:
1 helicopter
5 gallons of gas for the helicopter
5 pilots for the helicopter
1 stewardess to more...