Tunnel Jokes / Recent Jokes
Hangover: The wrath of grapes.
Income Tax: Capital punishment.
A used car is not always what it's jacked up to be.
Two silkworms were in a race. They ended up in a tie.
To my sweetheart: My cooking's gotten better since I fondue.
A robber broke into the police station and stole all the toilet seats, and the police didn't have anything to go on.
Middle Age: When actions creak louder than words.
Egotist: One who is me-deep in conversation.
Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused his dentist's Novocain during root canal work? He wanted to transcend dental medication.
Did you hear about the woman who started dating rakes and fell on hard tines?
Why won't melons elope in Las Vegas? They cantaloupe.
Q: What do Christmas and a crab on the beach have in common?
A: They both involve sandy claws.
Archeologist: A man whose career lies in ruins.
Kleptomaniac: One who can't help himself from helping himself.
Did you hear about the more...
The light at the end of the tunnel is the headlight of the on coming train.
Hangover: The wrath of grapes.Income Tax: Capital punishment.A used car is not always what it's jacked up to be.Two silkworms were in a race. They ended up in a tie.To my sweetheart: My cooking's gotten better since I fondue.A robber broke into the police station and stole all the toilet seats, and the police didn't have anything to go on.Middle Age: When actions creak louder than words.Egotist: One who is me-deep in conversation.Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused his dentist's Novocain during root canal work? He wanted to transcend dental medication.Did you hear about the woman who started dating rakes and fell on hard tines? Why won't melons elope in Las Vegas? They cantaloupe.Q: What do Christmas and a crab on the beach have in common? A: They both involve sandy claws.Archeologist: A man whose career lies in ruins.Kleptomaniac: One who can't help himself from helping himself.Did you hear about the snake who gave birth to a bouncing baby boa? Once I got angry at the chef of more...
Two Polish guys were taking their first train trip to Warsaw on the train. A vendor came down the corridor selling bananas which theyd never seen before. Each bought one. The first one eagerly peeled the banana and bit into it just as the train went into a tunnel. When the train emerged from the tunnel, he looked across to his friend and said, "I wouldnt eat that if I were you." "Why not?" "I took one bite and went blind for half a minute."
The newly born sperm was receiving instructions in conception from the instructor. "As soon as you hear the siren, run for the tunnel and swim in a straight line until you get to the entrance of a damp cavern. At the end of the cavern you will find a red, sticky ball which is the egg. Address it and say,' I'm a Sperm.' She will answer,' I'm an Egg.' From that moment on you will work together to create the embryo. Do you understand?" The sperm nodded affirmatively.
Two days later, the sperm is taking a nap when he hears the siren. He wakes immediately and runs to the tunnel. A multitude of sperm swim behind him. He knows he has to arrive first. When he nears the entrance to the cavern, he looks back and sees that he is far ahead of the other sperm. He is able to swim at a slower pace but does approach the red, sticky ball.
When, at last, he reaches the red, sticky ball, he smiles and says, "Hi, I'm a sperm!"
The red sticky ball more...
Cassie was taking two of her grandsons on their very first train ride, from Dayton, Ohio, to Washington, DC.A vendor came down the corridor selling Pop Rocks, something neither had ever seen before. Cassie bought each grandson a bag.The first one eagerly tore open the bag and popped one into his mouth just as the train went into a tunnel. When the train emerged from the tunnel, he looked across to his brother and said: "I wouldn't eat that if I were you.""Why not?" replied the curious brother "I took one bite and went blind for half a minute."