"Dilbert Zodiac" joke

Astrology tells us about you and your future simply by your birthday. The Chinese Zodiac uses the year of your birth.

Demographics tell us what you like, dislike, whom you vote for, what you buy and what you watch on television. Well, the Corporate Dilbert Zodiac goes a step further: simply by your department or job title, people will have you all figured out...
MARKETING You are ambitious yet stupid. You chose a marketing degree to avoid having to study in college, concentrating instead on drinking and socializing which is pretty much what your job responsibilities are now. Least compatible with Sales.
SALES Laziest of all signs, often referred to as' Marketing without a degree' you are also self-centered and paranoid. Unless someone calls you and begs you to take their money, you like to avoid contact with customers so you can concentrate on
the big picture. You seek admiration for your golf game throughout your life.
TECHNOLOGY Unable to control anything in your personal life, you are instead content to completely control everything that happens at your work place. Often even YOU don't understand what you are saying, but who can tell? It is written that the Geeks shall inherit the Earth.
ENGINEERING One of the only two signs that actually studied in school, it is said that 90% of all Personal Ads are placed by engineers. You can be happy with yourself: your office is typically full of all the latest ergo dynamic gadgets. However, we all know what is really causing your “carpal tunnel
ACCOUNTING The only other sign that studied in school (because you were too socially retarded to do otherwise), you are mostly immune from office politics. You are the most feared person in the organization; combined with your extreme organizational traits, the majority of rumors concerning you say that you are completely insane.
HUMAN RESOURCES Ironically, given your access to confidential information, you tend to be the biggest gossip within the organization. Possibly the only other person who does less work than marketing, you are unable to return any calls today because
you have to get a haircut, have lunch, AND mail a letter!
MIDDLE MANAGEMENT/DEPARTMENT MANAGEMENT/TEAM LEADERS Catty, cutthroat, yet completely spineless, you are destined to remain at your current job for the rest of your life. Unable to make a single decision you tend to measure your worth by the number of meetings you can schedule for yourself. Best suited to
marry other Middle Managers as everyone in your social circle is a Middle Manager
SENIOR MANAGEMENT Catty, cutthroat, yet completely spineless, you are destined to remain at your current job for the rest of your life. Unable to make a single decision you tend to measure your worth by the number of meetings you can schedule for
yourself. Best suited to marry other Senior Managers as everyone in your social circle is a Senior Manager
CUSTOMER SERVICE Bright, cheery, positive, you are a Fifty-Cent cab ride from taking your own life. As a child, very few of you asked your parents for a little cubicle for your room and a headset so you could pretend to play Customer Service. Continually passed over for promotions, your best bet is to sleep with your manager.