"One Headliners (2)" joke

One Headliners (2)

What is the real headline?

Brit Drops kid Again
Brit Dropkicks Angelina’s kid
Brit Drops Jason Kid on Angelina’s kid

The Heat-Wave Goodbye to Dallas
The Heat-Wave that Stroked Dallas
The Heat-Wave Goodyear bye Shaq and Give it to Wade

FBI Pursues Pretenders Masquerading as War Heroes
FBI Pursues Pretenders Masquerading as Whores to Charge Zero
FBI Pursues Nathan Lane for Masquerading as Meatball Hero