"Pinnochio had been getting " joke
Pinnochio had been getting complaints from his girlfriend. "Every time we make love," she said, "I get splinters." So Pinocchio went back to his maker, Gipetto the carpenter, for advice. "Sandpaper," said the carpenter. "That's what you need." So Pinocchio took some sheets of sandpaper and went home. A few weeks later the carpenter bumped into Pinocchio again. "How are you getting on with the girls now?" he asked. "Who needs girls?" said Pinocchio.
2 Scousers are riding along the M62 from Manchester to Liverpool on a motorbike. They break down and start hitching a lift. A friendly trucker stops to see if he can help and the scousers ask him for a lift.
He tells them he has no room in the wagon as he is carrying 20, more...
Knock Knock
Who's there!
Duncan!
Duncan who?
Duncan make your garden grow better! Knock Knock
Who's there!
Duncan!
Duncan who?
Duncan disorderly again! Knock Knock
Who's there!
Duncan!
Duncan who?
Duncan buscuits in more...
Dear Mom and Dad,
Our scoutmaster told us all to write to our parents in case you saw the flood on TV and worried. We are OK. Only one of our tents and two of our sleeping bags got washed away. Luckily none us got drowned because we were all up on the mountain looking for more...
What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.